I have an addiction to opiates, my drug of choice has been percocet. I've been addicted for about 9 months now. Today was the pivotal moment when I realized I desperately need help and moral support if I am ever going to get past this. I am actually a nurse, my job is very stressful and I started off by taking a couple of my mom's supply (she has chronic back pain). Today I had a small cyst on my thigh which actually was painful. I went to the MD to see if he would incise it but he said we should leave it alone for now. I asked for a prescription for percocet and he wrote #4 (four)....which I altered and changed to #40 (fourty). I know this was very wrong but now I'm scared what if they find out!? Does anyone know if pharmacies automatically send copies of filled prescriptions back to MD's? I'm really worried. about a month ago I tried to commit suicide by cutting my wrist, luckily someone came home and found me. I feel like my job is all I have left right now and if I lose that I doubt I will have the strength to get clean. I'm never impaired at work, I am a good nurse, I take care of my patients, I do not steal drugs from them, I usually just have a couple when my shift is over. Any feedbacck would be greatly appreciated!! My biggest concern right now is trying to figure out if pharmacies send copies of scripts back to md's even if no suspicion is present. The pharmacist did not look suspicious at all & was very nice. Of course I see prescriptions every day so i know how they can be altered. I really wish I hadn't done this but it's too late!
...your biggest worry right now is to quit taking drugs...you've crossed over to 'criminal'...if I were you I would tell the physician what I did, take him the pills and seek treatment...
(((Jade))) I can feel your pain and fear. I agree with Monica. It really dont matter if they send the scripts back or not, you might just get away with it...but you will be paying a huge price inside. I know the mind of addiction. Until and unless we are willing to do whatever it takes, our actions just get worse, never better. I have talked with nurses that progressed to the point of taking some of their patients pain meds. That is a last resort, and that is where we all get if we dont seek help immediately. Talk to your doctor about your actions. Let him know that you want to stop and ask him for suggestions. I dont know if you are at a point where a treatment center is necessary or not, and I do know that there are support groups for doctors and nurses. I have a friend that lost her liscense until she managed to gain and maintain sobriety to the satisfaction of the liscensing board. You really dont want to have to go that far in your addiciton. With you taking that first step toward recovery, you are setting your feet on the way to a freedom and happiness you seem to be searching for. When you discuss this with your doctor, please let him know that you have been depressed to the point of trying suicide. This is important. You, as a nurse, know that treatment cant be effective unless all the facts are presented. Please seek professional help immediately. Caring nurses are in dire need in our lives and each one that has gone thru addiction and comes out the other side is that much more effective for people such as me. Please see a doctor for the physical and mental help you need immediately, before trouble gets so bad you cant see your way out. Let us know how you are doing....you are not alone...and we do care. God bless....
