Sexual Health

I have been with my boyfriend for more than 4 months and we've fooled around in our underwears (either one person or both in underwear). Since this is my first relationship, I'm really paranoid about everything. What if precum soaks through his underwear or my underwear, etc... We've given each other oral sex quite a few times but that itself I know can't lead to pregnancy.

Last month, I had a really big scare because my period came one week late but I had cramps when I was supposed to have my period; just no period. I've had regular periods for years so this was really unexpected. That entire week was torture for me because I thought I was pregnant. And I never even had sexual intercourse... I started feeling queasy when I ate and my breasts felt tender that if i squeezed them, they hurt. Then my period came after 1 week; I think it was my period because it lasted for about 4-5 days and the bleeding was pretty heavy. Also, I had really really painful cramps, more painful than any I've had before. (One advil didn't even mask it completely). I used to have cramps only on the first day of my period.

I know I should be relieved but then I read online that sometimes women do have their periods when they're pregnant. I've also never had sore breasts before but it's been about 1.5-2 weeks since my period ended and I'm having breast soreness again. I also swear that my breasts are getting bigger and darker though I am a college student so I am also very stressed all the time and I'm gaining weight so the breast enlargement could be due to that too. But the breast tenderness comes and goes. I talked to my bf and he said I have nothing to worry about: my period came, etc etc, it's probably hormonal imbalance due to stress, diet, and the fact that I've never participated in any sexual activity before. Is it really just hormone imbalance? Am I being paranoid for no reason? Is there any reason I should take a pregnancy test or something?

Hi Kari, and welcome. From everything you have said, I think you are hyper aware of what you are doing, and monitoring all your physical changes and reactions rather closely. If I read your post correctly, you and your boyfriend have not yet had sexual intercourse as in penile-vaginal penetration, is that right? Also you haven't specified, but are you using any kind of birth control, or have you considered what you will use? If you have just started using the pill, your physical changes and reactions could be due to that. Otherwise, the things you are noticing and are aware of could be due to your concern about your newfound physical intimacy with your boyfriend, and perhaps concern as to how far you are going with him, and whether or not you are ready and prepared for it.

I doubt that you need to have a pregnancy test, but I would suggest that you go and talk to a doctor or counsellor at the health care center of your college. It really sounds to me as though you are heading to a degree of sexual intimacy, but aren't quite prepared for all that it implies, both physically and emotionally. Please, talk to a doctor who will listen and be able to advise you, or a counsellor, and don't take any risks or chances. If I can help you with anything else, please ask me. Take care, and stay healthy.

Nenu

CL – Sexual Health

 

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Hi Nenu,

For clarification, no, I'm not on any birth control and no we did not have penile-vaginal penetration intercourse. I admit that i worry about things a lot so it could very well be just my imagination but my sore breasts and severe cramps during my last period (as well as minor cramps when I was supposed to have my period last month) were not imagined. Do you have any idea what might cause symptoms like those?

Thank you very much for your reply. I feel a bit more at ease already.

-Kari