Lesbian Life

I have borrowed Gal's computer she has wireless, still waiting for the internet to get connected...my ss is so borrrrreeeeeddd with out it-not bored enough to get the school books out and study though!

Well we are here in our new house and it's just great. I walk around from room to room sighing the whole time this is my new house, this is our new house-yep smiles all round.

The move went relatively smoothly, we had lots of help from Gal's family, my lot pitched in which surprised me I usually have to nag for 2 hours to get a 5 min job done! DD was a little upset because she found out on the day and it was a shock to her, but even then she got in and packed this and that what she wanted to take.

Ex turned up for lunch and caught me in the middle of packing...not a pretty site and to say he was angry well you can imagine...there was lots of name calling and when he saw gal and her family the whole neighbourhood found out how loud he can yell.

We moved it all in one day started packing at 7.30am and the last load was off the back of the ute by 3pm. Never want to do that again, one of the hardest things I've had to do but yet one of elation too.

I am very emotional, one of my friends went through the same thing left her dh when her kids were about my kids ages and said don't make any decisions for the next 3 months on anything major...I can see why.  Some moments I have wings and the next thing I know I am sobbing my heart out.

Ex has settled down I have had a few visits with him and he is calmer but the tears have started, in the last 3 years I have gotten to the point 3 times that I have asked him to leave and the reason I have changed my mind and forgiven and forgotten was because of the tears. I nearly crumbled for a micro second and then I thought I haven't gone through what I went through to go back to that.

I told dd the other am about me and gal, she took it like her brothers did and didn't say much.  I have been walking around our house from room to room and sighing this is my house this is our house...this is our sweet life.

Only 3 weeks and Gal moves in...and yep I'm counting.

Congratulations. Good luck with everything. I went through something similar this past summer,including the sheer happiness and then awful crying just from all the changes in our lives.
How old are the kids? The ex sounds difficult.

Sara

mom to 3- age 13,11 and 6

Thanks for your best wishes, my kids are soon to be 18, 16, and soon to be 12. 

I have had a pretty good weekend emotionally, friday pm was the worst.  gal went away to visit her mum so it was just me and the kids...well me and dd, as the boys had plans with mates so didnt see them much.

How long did it take you for you to start feeling "normal". I was married for nearly 20 years, dating him for 2 yrs before that...it's kinda bitter sweet.  I want this life so much for me, for me and gal, for me and the kids but I still feel bad that I have hurt him he is alone and I have so much love around me.

You should share your story would love to hear it.

It has been 9 months since I came out and told him I was gay... a little longer for the separation to be official.

I do find, it is easier when the GF is around. I have a GF, but she doesn't live with me and I don't see her for days at a time, which is hard for me-since marriage is so immersive even if was not a perfect marriage. She is a lot younger then me-and this is her first real relationship...so...yeah... I do love her though...in my case I am giving it time and seeing if we can sync a bit more on this...

The being alone is hard, the seeing the effects on the ex and the kids... it has gotten easier over a few months, especially seeing the kids settle into the new home,area and schools.
I think once your new reality becomes a routine-something safe and predictable and real, things will settle down for you. It largely has for me.

I lost everything. I grew up religious orthodox jewish and my community, completely shunned me-as expected, so I lost all my friends in one fell swoop too. So, the crying had to do with alot more then just the coming out. I am the posse type-i love my friends, but that was too much for them.

Isn't it strange how as women we are told not to do things for ourselves. How deeply it is ingrained? I must say, it takes so much courage-ongoing courage...

As for the ex-when he settles, he may be able to come over and still be family. I think once he finds someone too, its easier.

Sara