I understand what you are going thru. I had the same situation happen to me in 04'. Planned pregnancy, was to be my second child. Was 17 weeks pregnant and went in for a routine office visit and could not locate the heartbeat. Ultrasound confirmed that the baby had died about 2 weeks prior. No cramps, bleeding or anything. I had even brought my 4 year old with at the time to her first office visit that day she she could hear the baby's heartbeat. It was the worst day of my life. I had a suction d&c the next morning. I cried for weeks straight. Took off 3 weeks of work and sat in my living room, drapes closed and cried. You are not alone, it does get better with time. I was able to conceive months later and have a beautiful healthy 4 1/2 year old daughter who is just the light of my life. I can't imagine life without her. I look back now and know that it all happened for a reason. I was supposed to have my little Abby. Had I not miscarried, Abby would not be here today. I have some comfort in knowing that. My thoughts and prayers are with you thru this difficult time. I have a collection of angel statues holding babies that I would buy each anniversary of my baby's death. They sit on a shelf in my living room. It gives me some comfort having an angel watch over me and my children.
I am now here again, as I am actively going thru another miscarriage. I got divorced last year and have been in a serious relationship for 5 months now. I saw my OB about putting in an IUD. Went there on a fri for placement, was due for my period that following day or two. HCG test in office was negative. Ended up with positive that following mon after IUD placed and hadn't gotton my period. I was in shock. Dr. said I'd probably miscarry because of placement and the IUD being there. serial HCG's showed normal preganancy so ended up in the office 1 1/2 week later for him to remove the IUD. Dr. said it had to come out because of the risks of leaving it in. He was unable to remove it, the pregnancy had drawn it into the uterus. He even dilated me in the office using local to try and remove it but couldnt. ultrasound showed IUD very close to baby and at this point baby had a heartbeat. Ended up having to go in for surgery this past tuesday to remove the IUD, no incisions, just dialated me to get it. Again....I will probabaly miscarry. Surgery did not go as planned and the IUD was inbedded in my uterine lining causing great difficulty in removing. He ended up getting it out, tearing some of my lining and said I would be very sore and bleed alot. He also told my boyfriend and I that the baby would not make it. So, here I sit 2 days post surgery waiting to loose my baby. It's an awful feeling. I just started bleeding this afternoon. Not heavy, but like the start of a period. Unsure if the pain is from surgery or cramping from a miscarriage. Dr. gave me very good pain pills and I have been loading up on those just to keep the pain under control. Obviously there is nothing I can take for the emotional pain that I am having. I was done having kids. My daughters are 4 1/2 and 10. I am 37 and was not wanting to have any more children, however it still hurts the same. My baby has gone thru so much already in "his" little life and we know that if he does make it thru all of this, that there is a reason. We are letting God's will preside. Your thoughts and prayers would be appreciated.
