Herpes, HPV & Other STDs

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Such a prettyGirl Now Dying

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  5580.1
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  Nov-3 11:02 am
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Im crying as i write this................. Im so stupid ....... growing up my moms boyfriend used to always touch on me and rape me and i would tell her about it and she didn't believe me.  All through my teenage years i always had discharge and she never took me to the doctor she always said it would just go away.. By her doing this to me made me feel like she didn't care about me and then i stop caring about myself. I had unprotected sex with ppl rather i knew them or i was in a realationship ...i mean not with ere body ...but when i turned 19 she finally took me to the doctor for the first time in my life and i got my first pap smear,...i had gonerra for 3 years !!! After i took all the pills then another discharge came...it was small ity bity clumps of white discharge followed by a brown  liquidy discharge that comes out of me... and it smells like pee...my nose is always runny and my back always hurt, i got a rash on my foot, and im scared as hell... I got dry spots on my face(well i kinda ben having them like forever) but i read up on it and its possiable i could have herpes and hiv....so i went to the doctor and they found out i had herpes in my blood ..... im so scared cause ppl who have both have the brown water and it take 7-8 years for the hiv to show up ..... so now im gonna die ...no man is gonna want me if i tell him the truth..my famly doesn't care about me ...god prob. wishes id just kill myself...... why???? Should i just kill myself?
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Such a prettyGirl Now Dying

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  5580.2 in response to 5580.1
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  Nov-3 11:18 am
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  4

?
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Such a prettyGirl Now Dying

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  5580.3 in response to 5580.1
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  cmamyd  Member Icon
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  Nov-3 3:39 pm
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  4

I'm sorry you're feeling so down.  I'd suggest that you talk with another doctor, and ask all of your questions.  You might even find it helpful to talk to a therapist or counselor regarding your concerns and feelings.

Please be patient with this board.  The members here have lives outside of iVillage, including jobs and families, and can't always answer a question immediately.  They will be here as soon as they can though.

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Such a prettyGirl Now Dying

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  5580.4 in response to 5580.1
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  Nov-3 5:13 pm
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  4

Ok, just calm down. It can take anywhere from 3 weeks to 6 months for HIV to show up in your blood. My advice to you is to get tested (if you haven't already). I know it's nerve wrecking to wait to find out results, but in the meanwhile, do your research from respectable websites and books. Educate and prepare yourself for the results. Having any kind of incurable STD is something you have to deal with and learn to control, but most of all you have to learn to accept it yourself. It sucks, I know, but it's NO REASON TO KILL YOURSELF.

Discharge is normal and can vary with your menstrual cycle, again, research it. Find out about it all that you can; and come here and ask questions. The white, clumpy discharge kind of sounds like a yeast infection and the brown, liquid discharge could be your body preparing for your period. Is the brown discharge still happening? When does it happen? You may want to call your doctor back and schedule another appt. just to be on the safe side. Another important thing for you to do is have regular pap smears, go at least once a year unless your doctor specifies another time frame. But don't freak out! :) Be strong and know that you can handle any outcome. You can always come here to vent, ask questions, read over some of the older posts if it'll help ya. But the advice I give everybody is to educate themselves about what they have and if you have questions, try to find the answers. It'll be ok, so DON'T HURT YOURSELF. Come back and let us know what's happening. :)

BML
*good vibes your way*

http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/womens-health/brown-liquid-not-like-discharge-32720.html (Read the #4 post)

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