Your Well-Being: Ages 43-59

Aloha Ladies,,,

I have missed you all so I am back....

Today I heard some one say .... ->

"Do you know why people hate to admit that they are lonely? It is because when you do... people think there is something wrong with you. They think I have people in my life why don’t you?… But the strange thing is you can have people in your life and still be alone."

So true ha? Ladies?

I have a whole lot people in my life but I still feel all alone in my journey here on planet Earth. Maybe everyone feels like this ... do  you?

When I go out or travel out of the country I can't help bonding to the people I meet... still when I come home and  close my front door I am alone... Some days I really struggle to find the meaning of me being here on Planet earth and more times then none I come up with nothing.... I don't dare go out side and be around a lot of people because I usually come down sick. Any positive (laughing, dancing having fun) or negative stress (any thing that makes me sad) in my life seems to bring on flu like symptoms (like my blood hurts) which takes me days and some times weeks to get over.  Therefore most days I spend by myself to deal with my thoughts. I hate that... and with the swine flu virus floating around out there I am even more  scared to leave my house because of my fear of being ill. I hate hospitals and I will do any thing not to go to one again.

Humm... the weird thoughts that go through my brain sometimes..... I do love living life and being with people and having fun.... but it is so lonely to live some times.... I am afraid that the older I get the more lonely I will become because of my fear of being ill... Can any one relate to what  I am saying?

I don't think expressing those types of feelings is weird at all.  Since you have to be so very careful about your exposure to germs, it does rather isolate you at times.  Then it would be normal to feel quite alone.  You've always spoken about your dear William who seems to be a very loving husband....so you are blessed by that!

Then, of course, even though we have families and friends.....we each are unique and individual....so in that sense we each travel this life "alone".  For me, my faith helps me know that I am never completely alone.

Do you read or have a hobby....work with your hands?  Knit or paint or???   Maybe something like that would help pass the time so you don't have so much time to "think".

That being said.....I do not think your thoughts are at all unusual!  Hang in there!

Hugs,  

        Sooze            

                             

 

 

 

 

              

                        

                       

Aloooohhhaaa Sooze!

Mahalo for the reply after reading it I feel perfectly normal... yeah!

Yes I do have a hobby I sew  and make kids cloths.  Here is a sample of what I do with my time

http://hulagirlleilani.tripod.com/myadventuresinliving/index.album/leilanis-adventures-in-living?i=10

Also I walk to the park almost every day.  I try to keep moving doing something each day to fight my never ending depressions.  Plus having  two dogs around me during the day helps with the lonelyness when it decides to pop up it's ugly head.

Mahalo again for talking to me... you made me feel much better

What you say makes perfect sense to me. .. I tend to withdraw to my artwork at this time in my life . After awhile I begin to feel like I need more involvement with people and I know I need to interact with someone and it   sure enough) alittle  helps.  My mom was a wise , strong silent woman.. Not long before she passed, I asked her why do I feel so very alone most of the time at this age ?  She said that is normal and as we age it will be better (from a no nonsense woman) .  If I let things get to me I have a problem lately with getting ill- it has to do with -sensitivity- to the world around you and I am learning - ((protecting yourself)) - which I sometimes forget to do.  Someone  told meI am a caregiver-- but if you lose your identity and don't take care of yourself--- it works against everything then... so a balance I guess?  .. 

It sounds like wherever you go you make music (symbolically)- you light up other people's lives.

everything seems to run in cycles I think..     Rose

Lei,

I understand what you are feeling. I suspect that you, like myself, are a very sensitive person. I have spent my entire life feeling like an outsider, like I am different than other people and somehow abnormal. Sometimes my emotions feel so "raw" that I have to "hide" from the world until I can cope again. This makes for a lonely life at times even though my life is full of loving people. I am also very introverted which is another "whammy." I re-energize by spending time alone which makes people think I want to be left alone which alienates some. Perhaps you are an introvert too?

I am happy to hear that you have a supportive husband (I do as well) and furry babies to love you and hobbies that you enjoy. That makes life a little easier.

I have found that talking with my husband and a few trusted friends and sometimes even a counselor helps me.

I like to think that what you are feeling is a testimony to your evolved spirit; your quest for growth and knowledge; your extraordinarily developed senses.  Thank you for posting this. It helped me realize that I am not alone in what I feel.