Dealing With Difficult People

First off, it's been a long time since I have been on this board.  But this situation has gone on far too long....

I have a day job, but recently a few friends and I have begin an event planning business that seems to be doing ok.  We have only begun it a few months ago.  We have a planner, a florist, a photographer (me) and bookeeper.  Anyway, we have had a couple of paid jobs, but have also done a few things as favors just to get noticed and let people see what we can do.  I have recently purchased a very nice professional camera that is not only used in the business, but it my own personal camera.  This SHOULD mean I can take pictures anywhere I choose.  Well, apparently, this is not the case. 

The planner has basically decided she is our boss.  We all four equally went into this as partners and she has called the shots, called us out, taken jobs without consulting with us first and said we WOULD DO THEM, planned nights and days for us without checking in first to see if we are busy, it's a nightmare.  I took pictures for free of her children that she said would be great to use as promotion for how well I photograph.  Okay, fine.  I get that.  And was fine with that.  And now she is TELLING ME we will take pics of someone she knows that is pregnant as a favor too.  But when I mentioned my best friend getting married soon she demanded that I do not take any pictures at her wedding unless I get paid and she wants to see the money.  This is a very casual wedding that required no planning....and my friend wants me to be there.  I didn't offer to take the photos, however, I was going to take the camera and take a few shots candidly during the ceremony as well as a few of her in her dress and was going to let that be a gift to her.  Professional photographers do it all the time for people they know and because we are just getting started, anything I can place in my portfolio paid or not will only help me in the long run. 

Well the planner paid or florist to make a corsage for her son but didn't pay me to take the pics I took and is now always wanting to borrow MY CAMERA for her own stuff.  It's aggravating me and I am thinking seriously about pulling out.  I have told her that I will take whatever pictures I choose but she continues to chew my face off if she doesn't get her way.  I need advice. 

You are being asked for unreasonable things. Tell her no.

"I'm sorry, that's my personal camera and I don't loan it out."

"I am taking pictures for a friend with my own equipment on my own time. This does not concern you."

"You are being rude and this is unprofessional."

In the end, I think you do NOT want to be in business with this person. Tell your other partners privately why you are leaving and then send a professional e-mail to all three stating simply that you will no longer be participating in this venture. Be prepared for the possibility that your other partners will ask you to stay. Do it only on terms that work for you- either a total attitude adjustment or absence by this woman. You are being bullied and you do not have to put up with it.

I echo what the other poster shared. Plus, IMO a business relationship...ANY business relationship...needs a written, signed agreement among partners. This will help clarify the boundaries, duties and responsibilities so these sorts of challenges don't develop. It's sad because we think this isn't necessary since we're "friends". Well, unfortunately people need some structure to pull off a successful business venture.

Gail