Originally, Bree Van de Camp’s gingerbread houses and platters of colourful cookies were logical diversions to real-life actress Marcia Cross’ bulging baby bump. Unfortunately, when Cross was ordered to bed rest last January, the Desperate Housewives crew was forced to turn the mom-to-be’s house into shooting headquarters for two days, and our mysterious Orson-Bree storyline screeched to an early, and disappointing, end.
After a weeks-long hiatus, the show returned last Sunday to the lowest viewership ever, and notably, without the red-haired mommy. Because of creator Marc Cherry’s decision to ignore the pregnancy, we were left with a soap-opera like storyline, which climaxed when Gabrielle lost her wardrobe to a water mishap and Edie stripped naked in front of a confused Carlos. Watching reruns of Passions would have been more titillating.
While some may argue that Wisteria Lane turned lame after the first season, there were those of us who held high hopes for Season 3. But minus a mystery and the most neurotic housewife, what leg does the show have left to stand on?
Should Cherry have opted to write Cross’s pregnancy into the script? It could have created a fun parallel storyline to Bree’s daughter, Danielle becoming pregnant, but then again either scenario seems to merit a jump the shark status.
TV pregnancies have evolved a long way since Lucy McGillicuddy Ricardo made television history by being “in the family way.” So big an event was the first public, unmentionable pregnancy, that Lucy and Desi’s son, Desi Arnaz Jr. became TV Guide’s first cover on April 3, 1953.
Since then, Wilma Flintstone, Kathy Segal, Lisa Kudrow, Jane Kaczmarek, and lately Amanda Peet and Jaime Pressly are just some of the notable actresses who have had their pregnancies written to parallel the characters they portray.
Each can arguably be pointed to as the catalyst for when their shows went sour.
Once Pebbles Flintstone was born, the Rubbles adopted super-child Bam Bam, and we were subjected for random bouts of, “Bam. Bam, Bam. Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam, Bam” as a result. Similarly, when actress Kathy Segal announced her pregnancy, Married with Children co-wrote bellies for both Peggy and her neighbour Marcy, rendering an even whinier and helpless Ms. Bundy. When Segal miscarried, the show pulled a Dallas, and decided that the whole pregnancy would be a dream.
Friends writers may have been trying to generate some discussion when they worked Lisa Kudrow’s pregnancy in, but the storyline of Phoebe carrying her brother’s baby turned into a bad joke involving the mythical Greek Goddess and her brother Coeus, at best. The same can be said of Malcolm in the Middle mom Lois (Jane Kaczmarek), who clearly had her hands full with four boys and should never have had another kid. The storylines were getting weak in its fourth season, but a new baby turned out to be a quick-fix. The joke ran until the series finale, when Lois discovered she was pregnant for the sixth time.
Writers on My Name is Earl have gone about Jaime Pressly’s pregnancy a little differently, having her character go through flashbacks to previous pregnancies, while Studio 60 writers used Amanda Peet’s pregnancy to create Jordan’s love triangle.
Ironically, those TV actresses who aren’t with child in real life, but portray pregnant woman on their shows usually fair better. Who could forget Archie Bunker’s line upon learning that his daughter Gloria (Sally Struthers) was pregnant on All in the Family? “Can’t you say you’re expecting? Pregnant sounds like you done something.” Of course, Struthers ended up getting a shot at a spin off. Candace Bergen also made history by her early ‘90s TV pregnancy on Murphy Brown, which sparked international debate about the merits of two-parent vs. single parent families.
Jennifer Aniston scored thanks to her pregnancy on Friends; the season finale where she gave birth ended up being the episode that garnered her an Emmy for Outstanding Actress in a Lead Role. Sex and the City star and fellow Emmy-recipient Cynthia Nixon hadn't become pregnant yet when her character, Miranda, had baby Brady; writers worked around Nixon’s subsequent real-life pregnancy by making it hard for Miranda to lose her “baby fat.”
Of course, not all TV pregnancies result in a power push: quite possibly the worst baby story goes to Growing Pains’s Maggie Seaver. Joanna Kerns wasn’t expecting in real life, but her fictional child was a clear jump the shark moment, especially when baby Chrissy magically aged three years in one to make for a more interesting storyline.
With a seemingly 50-50 chance at survival, it’s no wonder writers are so hesitant to write in actress’s real-life pregnancies. Notable examples of closet mommies include Sarah Jessica Parker (like Carrie Bradshaw could ever handle a kid!), Mary McCormack and Mary Louise Parker from The West Wing, Law and Order: SVU’s Mariska Hargitay, Everybody Loves Raymond’s Patricia Heaton (they had enough little ones running around), Debra Messing from Will and Grace, The X-Files's Gillian Anderson (instead she was kidnapped by aliens, which played into a huge storyline later), and Frasier’s Jane Leeves, who learned she was pregnant as the Niles-Daphne storyline was picking up, and just became fat instead.
It’s a tough gamble to make in a world where loyal fans become up in arms over the slightest changes and new fans are drawn in trying to look for hypothetical baby bumps. Did Desperate Housewives choose wisely in hiding Marcia Cross’s pregnancy? Since the show has been renewed for four more years, we have until 2011 to find out.
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