Debt Support Group

Hi all,

I've been lurking a while and found you all very inspiring.

I'm incredibly overwhelmed and go in and out of denial about my debt problem.

Im a 39 yo boy (hope u gals dont mind), single with no dependents and overwhelmed with debt.  I love my home, family, the arts and dating.

I make fairly good money (I think).  In the mid-eighties.

I own and love my little house (still owe 89000 but its worth 265000) but my debt is like a ball and chain around my neck.  I tend to ostrich and then spend more.

I have 52250 in consumer debt (there i said it) from a high of 53000.

I do have locked in retirement funds that I cant touch 55k personal and 112k from work.

I can make my bills but seem to make no headway.  I have access to 125k in credit (sheesh). My credit cards range from 3.25 percent to 11.5 percent.

My credit rating is very good.

I am thinking about getting a mortgage line of credit to consilidat all at 3.75 percent but then i'm worried about running up my cards again.

I hope I'm not annoying any of you as I know some of you are out of work and struggle just to get by but I need some support, suggestions and kind words.

I feel trapped and at time a bit hopeless.

Hope to hear from you,

PS...How do I add my ticker at the bottom

Welcome Duke!!

Boys are always welcome here - we just rarely have one show up!

Can you maybe give us some breakdown of where your money is going? Do you spend a lot on certain things? Extra-curriculars?

Perhaps if you gave us a better scope of where your money is going we can give you a better idea of where you might be able to cut back or save and put towards c/c's.

Do you use your c/c's daily? Weekly? If you are worried you would rack them up after consolidating (which isn't something I personally recommend because you are putting unsecured debt (credit cards) into a secure debt (home)). This could equal trouble. But anyway, if you are using your c/c's for daily use then you need to STOP all use of them. NOT using them will become habit. Lock 'em away - give 'em to someone you trust to hold onto - do what is necessary. Just don't use them.

I am a fan of having an emergency fund - efund - to get you started. You might not be able to bulid one up too fast but IF you do run low on $$ you efund will be there so you don't rely on a c/c to bail you out. Most people here support and encourage a $1,000 efund to start. But, it takes a lot of us quite a while to build up that.

Hugs to you - keep posting. We are here to support.

I haven't figured out the ticker part myself but I can tell you that consoldating your credit card debt into a home loan is a bad idea.

1.  You aren't getting rid of debt you are just moving it around.

2. You are paying unsecured debt with a secured loan and putting you home on the line. 

3.  You won't be doing anything to change your lifestyle so that the debt cycle doesn't continue.   Far too many people have done what you have done, only to rack up the credit cards again.  

I personally follow Dave Ramsey for debt reduction.   His method works.  It empowers and it changes your mindset about money in a positive way.

stacy

I think you hit it right on yourself: I tend to ostrich and then spend more.

Perhaps the first thing is to sit down and work on a budget? No more denial.

I agree with what everyone has said. I couldn't stop using my cards until I was permanently forced to stop using them. They were all in collections and closed because I stopped paying on them for months and months. I wouldn't advise doing that! But I would advise cutting up most, if not all of your cards. If the temptation is there, you will use it, and until you can learn to be responsible with credit cards, it's best to just not use them at all. And by responsible, I mean if you use a card, you have the cash to back it up and you transfer that cash immediately to savings so that when the bill comes, you can pay it in full!

You have to change your thinking. And you need to come up with a plan. Plans empower people. You make a good amount of money, but there must be some reason that you are in that much debt. What are you spending your money on? Are you living outside of your means, even though your means are above average? The easiest way I've found to see what you're spending your money on is to track everything. I do this with quicken software but it could be as simple as a piece of blank paper and a pen. Write down what you spend your money on for a week. When I did this, I found that my family was eating fast food and ordering out to the tune of $500 dollars a month. I was shocked! So for us, we have been trying to cut down on that and it's been a hard process because our lifestyle doesn't always support home-cooked meals. It's been something we've been working on for a year and we are much better now! I just did a report on quicken and for the last 12 months, we've been averaging $421 dollars on eating out each month. Last month, we only spent $300, so it's a slow and painful process changing your life, but it can be done.

 

Abbie