Anger Management

One type is where you know exactly why you're angry and you can deal with it. The builder doesn't show up AGAIN. You see your child picked on by older kids. You come home and the house looks like a bomb hit it. Whatever the situation you feel the anger, but you know exactly why you're angry and you can express that anger in a way that leads to a resolution. This sort of anger doesn't leave you feeling particularly bad about yourself - ok you may have raised your voice but it didn't get out of hand, and it was good that other people in the situation knew how you felt.

The other type is when the anger in you seems to aquire a force of its own and before you know it you're out of control. You may still know what the initial provocation was, but your reaction has escalated way beyond a proportionate level. This sort of anger leaves you feeling ashamed, depressed and with your self-esteem even more battered than before.

If that second situation sounds familiar to you then the secret is your AUTOMATIC THOUGHTS. Some thought process is going on in your head that has convinced you that you are being victimised or treated unfairly. Most probably you are not aware of these thoughts going on at all, and this is where Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) comes in. CBT is a system that helps you track down and record these authomatic thoughts- and then ultimately challenge and rework them.

Let me tell you from experience that this is not easy, and it's important to stay focused for weeks or even months to see real improvements. I have dipped in and out of CBT for years, but I am finally working with an experienced CBT therapist and we're really getting somewhere. The book she uses is "Mind over Mood" by Dennis Greenberger and Christin Padesky. If you want to learn more about CBT then it's a great place to start.

Link to the book here: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0898621283/qid=1099383719/sr=8-1/ref=pd_csp_1/002-1818280-0847251?v=glance&s=books&n=507846

All the best,

Carol