Attachment Parenting

I co-sleep and am still nursing. Emma turned 3 in July. She is my third daughter and last child and the daughter I have nursed the longest. I feel like I'm the longest nurser ever. While I know that's not true, it does feel like it sometimes. My only goal was to get to a year. I thought for sure emma would wean herself by 2. Then after she turned 2, I thought she would wean herself by 3. Well, we're still nursing. I've done some research and the natural weaning age averages 3 1/2 So, I guess for all practical purposes, I'm still average. By this time, the moms are ready to wrap it up. I suppose that's me too.

I am just wondering how many other moms are still nursing older toddlers. Emma only nurses before bed and then early morning, which is the last nursing sessions co-sleeping kids give up. Like most moms during this time, half the time I'm ready for her to quit and the other half of the time, I thinking maybe this is the last time I nurse (and she's our last daughter) and savor this moment. I'm also grateful I'm still nursing when she gets sick (like this week) b/c she'll usually nurse even if she's not eating much.

I appreciate your feedback!

I haven't been on in forever, but I seriously think you need(ed) to hear from someone else in the same boat. My daughter will be three in January and still nurses 10+ times a day (depending on the day). Typically if we are out and she's not bored and/or uncomfortable, she will totally forget about it and not ask to nurse, so we will have less total sessions that day. When we're at home, she asks fairly often.

We also still co-sleep and she nurses once or twice in the night. Some nights I suspect she doesn't nurse at all if I get in bed with her early enough (she goes to sleep early (around 6pm) because she doesn't nap at all anymore, so she will be on her own in bed until 9/10 or so). Some nights she sleeps until I get to bed, and wakes when I come in to nurse, most nights she will wake up at least once before, and I'll go in to nurse her for about 15 minutes and then get up again. It's odd how at this stage I'm totally unaware of what she does at night as far as nursing goes (I'm pretty positive I could pull my shirt up in my sleep and help her get comfy and not remember a thing in the morning or even totally wake up as I'm doing it!!) because it's such habit to respond to her and doesn't interrupt my sleep at all.

I'm not really ready to give up the nursing yet (though it's not my call...) and Ellie's not either, but I'm starting to question whether I have the stamina to deal with all the comments that I'm sure are coming. She went to her first day of a mommy and me style preschool (1.5 hours one day a week) and there was a 20 minute portion where the parents were in another room. I checked to make sure she was comfortable with that, and she was, but when I came back she asked loudly to nurse several times, and I sure got some stares! I just hope that I don't let other people dictate that journey for us and can let things take their natural course since that's what I decided to do from the beginning.

If you haven't checked out that "Breastfeeding, Mongolian Style" article (I think maybe it was on the Extended Breastfeeding Board??) online, then you should. It just reaffirmed for me that our culture has some narrow ideas about what is "normal" as far as the duration of breastfeeding goes, and that if you look at the world as a whole, you probably wouldn't think anything of breastfeeding a 3-year-old. What I'm getting at is that I think one of you will get a pretty clear signal when that aspect of your relationship is over, and now doesn't seem to be the time. There's at least two of us out there (and I suspect, many more).

Hey there,

Samantha has stopped but I did nurse her past two years old. Just wanted to let you know that extended nursers are out there!

~Darcy

Just wanted you to know--you're not the longest nurser out there! I nursed my firstborn till he was almost 2, my secondborn till he was 3 years old, and my third, my daughter, till she was four. Like you, she was my last. I decided to just let her go until she said she was done, but during her three-year-old year, I planted little seeds like "Four is a good time to be done nursing," and things like that. "When will you be ready to be done? When you are four?" And one day, shortly after turning four, she didn't nurse one night before bed. Fine, that occasionally happened. The next night she didn't nurse either, said she was too tired (?) so I asked if she was done nursing. "Yes, I do feel that I am," she said. And that was it!

For getting through this last phase of nursing and approaching weaning, I *highly* recommend the book _How Weaning Happens_, by LLL. It has good advice, and has totally respectful and helpful thoughts regarding weaning at any age. It's one of those books that both encourages you to go on, while also giving you permission to stop. An excellent one. good luck!

Annie