When Breadwinner is Mom

Friends pretty well know the score -- he's of more value raising the kids than looking for work which is miserably hard to find here & now.

Family, I don't ask, and they're too polite to mention it. Mom used to rant about my sister working out of the home because "there's nobody at home raising the kids". In a pinch, I've got enough blackmail material (reminders) to shut her up. (As in, "You complained that nobody was raising your other grandchildren. Fred is there." and "Yea, your house was neater/cleaner than mine. You had YOUR mother come in every week to help")

I think my family and friends thought it was easier on H than it was.  No one understands how he could walk away from his family...let alone a family that allowed him to stay at home all day and do nothing (which he did...seriously...he never cleaned, cooked or took Ray out...I would get home and he was on the couch with a blanket and Ray was half dressed in his swing or something...ugh).  I digress...one friend of mine that is a SAHM (and is working on her masters) has strong feelings about Mom being able to stay home.  But understands that it's not always feasible.

I often wonder how I would do with a less than FT job and staying home more often.  I don't think I could give up working 100%.  A lot of guys that I date make less than I do and I wonder if I might get roped into another non-working SAHD routine should I settle down again.

My co-workers are all really great about it. I did have a problem in another message board (A simplicity forum I belong to) where a member criticized my DH for not working when we have some debt. But what is the point of him working when he didnt make much more than the day care? The person made my DH seem like a bum, or irresponsible. Another member stepped in and said that person would never think to say that if it had been a woman staying home to raise her kids.

I don't feel like I should have to explain DH to anyone because his job is just as hard as mine if not harder, and he has longer hours and lower pay, lol.

Amy

It seem sometimes you just can't win. People complain when both parents are working, then they complain when the Dad is home. Hey...at least one parent is home. Why does it always have to be the mom.