Breastfeeding/Lactation Consultant

I’m so sorry to hear about your Dad. I’m sure it’s been very difficult for your entire family.

There’s really no set number of times per day a 14 month old should be bf and the fact that he willingly dropped the feedings he did probably suggests he was ready to give them up or otherwise he would have protested more.

The way to judge if a baby is getting enough to eat (solids and bf) is if they are growing well and healthy as your lo seems to be.

You’d probably be surprised how much he’s getting in those four feedings. Be flexible and if he seems to want more (or even less) it’s usually good to follow the baby’s cues. One of the nicest things about bf a toddler is that they will fill in the nutritional gaps via bf when they have days that they aren’t eating their solids so well or when they only want one or two favorite foods.

Thank you so much for your response. This has been very hard to deal with. My dad and I were very close. We talked all the time, and saw each other often. He was a huge part of my kids life as well and we were always doing something with him. He was not sick at all, and we had just spent the whole weekend with him two days before he passed away. So, it has been hard. But, I have found that bfing has helped me keep it together. I know that I have to be strong for my kids. I also know that I have to continue to eat, and keep up myself in order to bf my son. Which, I know is a huge help in keeping me sane right now. So, I really wanted to keep up the bfing and didn't even want to attempt to wean anytime soon.

I figured that if he wanted more that he would ask for it. Like I said, he is still eating a ton and peeing and pooping fine. If anything, he is actually eating more solids now because of this. Which, is also a good thing. My little guy has always had problems gaining weight, and has not really gained anything in the last 3 months or so, but he is growing in length fine. So, that is why his doctors have never really been concerned. I figured that at this point he really doesn't need to be drinking as much milk as he used to. But, it was a very sudden change. And, I wanted to make sure that I should not be trying to get more in or offering whole milk.

Thanks again.

Erica....Loving wife to Sam,and Mommy to my Liliana Isabel 6-6-04 and Sebastian Jacob 8-24-08 

                            

I just wanted to add that you may want to check and see if there are any local bereavement support groups in your area. They are often offered by hospitals or churches. You might ask your local hospital social services or pastoral care people to find one.

I don’t mean to suggest you are not grieving appropriately b/c I think all that you describe is ‘normal’ but I know I found bereavement support very helpful after I lost my baby. It was helpful to talk to others who went through similar experiences and be in a place where I could talk and share my feelings openly.