I thought she had allergies or at the worse bronchitis but no Eddowyn has pneumonia and I'm freaking out about it...just a little. This is her first really "big" sickness. She doesn't have a fever, jumping around like she's not sick, looks find all but bags under her eyes, but still I'm a little bit scared. She started pre-K about 2 1/2 weeks ago and just before that we went to FLA. She been coughing for about 2 weeks now.
I know that she's going to be fine but there is a little bit inside me that is screaming "NO! not her. I can't do it again!" I don't want it to deal with this, I want to hide under the covers and make it all go away. I want to keep her safe. I know that she'll be fine, she'll get better...but still this is so scary for me.
If you didn't know I had whooping cough before and they thought it was pneumonia. That is what killed Nelyn. Yes he was only 18 days old and Eddowyn is so much older but I don't think the fear every goes away.
I know Edd's going to be fine. She's 4 yrs old not 4 weeks. She's been vax'ed. She's strong. She's healthy. She will make it through. But the fear is there. I hate this feeling. Swine flu is something that scares the bejeasus out of me and I thank God that she doesn't have that.
I don't really know about me. I'm putting on a very strong front for her and T but when they're not looking I'm...weeelll, lets just say that it's not so good. I need someone to tell me that it will get better, that she will get better.
I know and knew that this day would come or something like it, but still it's scary. I don't know what I would do if she had to go to the hospital. Just thinking about it is really, really freaking me out. She on antibiotic, steroid and an inhaler. If she's doesn't get better in a week we go back into the doctor's and get x-rays and stronger meds.
Just say a prayer for her and send me some calming energy, I could use it.
Thanks
