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My soon to be angel...

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  18566.1
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  destinite  Member Icon
date:
  Nov-3 6:17 pm

Ok, I hope you all do not mind, as this is kind of a strange place for me right now.  It was suggested I come here so I do hope this is ok.  I am currently pregnant - but he is not doing well and we know it is a matter of time now.  My babies name is Michael and he has Trisomy 18.  I just came back from my doctors appointment and my blood pressure is a little high - 140 something over 94 and I do have extra fluid : ( so they are monitoring me weekly now... The baby is measuring a week behind, but within normal.  His kidneys look really pretty good, one is a little enlarged but they are not really worried about that.  He has a little cyst on his brain with fluid, so he is now hydrocephalic ( I think that is how you spell???) His heart is now enlarged - so overall, not a happy visit, but it really is what we kind of sort of expected ~ short of a miracle.  Just not fun but we are still hangin in there, but the doctor does not seem to have a lot of hope for a live birth, so I am here hoping to gain some sort of insight if that is possible...  Thank you ladies and I am so sorry for all of you, I have been reading and you are an amazing group of women. 
Jodi

 
 
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hlycp  Member Icon
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My soon to be angel...

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  18566.2 in response to 18566.1
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  hlycp  Member Icon
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  destinite  Member Icon
date:
  Nov-3 7:19 pm

Jodi,
I am SO sorry you have a reason to come looking for us. I will be praying for a miracle for your little Michael. Please keep us updated on how he is doing.

We found out our daughter was gone at our 34 week appointment after a normal pregnancy, so I cannot identify with knowing you might lose him. I can't imagine how hard it is. I think it is good that you are coming here to prepare yourself though... The women here are so incredibly wonderful and supportive. They have made a seemingly impossible journey a little more manageable.

One thing I would do if I were you is contact Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/ They are a group of professional photographers who will go to the hospital to take pictures of your little angel for free. I know there are some who will come do maternity photos if you know your baby might not make it. I think you would cherish both photos. At first I thought the idea of photos was not something I would want, but my midwife encouraged me to and I am sooooo thankful I have the pictures I do of Callia. Also, get together anything you can think of to cherish the moments you have with your baby. I wish I had a lock of her hair and had done hand print and footprint molds, I wish I had taken pictures of me with her...  

Once again, I am so sorry... Please come here as often as you need to.

Sending you lots of prayers and hugs,
~Sara

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My soon to be angel...

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  18566.3 in response to 18566.1
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  susan_gracie
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  destinite  Member Icon
date:
  Nov-3 8:38 pm

Jodi,

I think that Sara stated some very wonderful points.. I have so many regrets now 21 months after the fact...I wish I would have rocked my baby girl, I wish I would have kept a journal of her life inside of me of all of her "firsts" because now they are all a blur and I can't get them back. I wish I had more video of her ultra sounds, pictures of me pregnant and I wish I had some pictures of me with her in the hospital. Most importantly I wish I would not have been so afraid of her..I feared that I might hurt her or break a limb off of her while holding her that I didn't want to hold her much. I simply didn't know what was right or how to act around my precious daughter who was gone forever..I lost my daughter full term, 40 weeks and 4 days and was due to be induced the day after she passed. Gracie did not have much hair so I don't think I could have gotten any of that.. although I wish I had a lock of it now.

Foot prints/molds and hand molds.. man I wish I had those too.. there are so many things if I had to do it over that I would want to have and do..

I can not imagine the pain that you are going through wondering what will happen and how long you have with Michael. I am so sorry and will pray for you and your family.
Susan
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My soon to be angel...

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  18566.4 in response to 18566.3
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  gndma2angelnathan
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  susan_gracie
date:
  Nov-3 9:06 pm

Jodi, you and your family will be in my prayers for a miracle. Thursday will be the 3 month anniversary for my grandson. This site is so amazingly supportative. To all family members. Not just the moms and dads out there.  Like the post before, keep us informed and we are all here to listen, cry and eventually laugh with you.
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cmcfinn  Member Icon
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My soon to be angel...

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  18566.5 in response to 18566.1
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  cmcfinn  Member Icon
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  destinite  Member Icon
date:
  Nov-3 10:15 pm

Hi Jodi -
I'm so sorry you are facing a possible stillbirth. I was in your exact shoes not too long ago. I went to the TTC after Stillbirth board because I didn't know the Stillborn board was here. I unfortunately did have to join the group as we lost our daughter at 27 weeks.

Like you, I came here to look for support and advice. I got a lot of amazing replies and I wanted to share the link to my post and the subsequent replies in the hopes it helps you in some way.
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-ppttcafstill/?msg=18002.1

I will pray for a miracle for you and Michael.
Wishing you peace in the days and weeks ahead.
-Colleen

Missing our sweet baby Grace Ruth. She was with us for 27 weeks and was due 12.24.09. She could not grow properly due to a placenta deficiency and though we were closely monitored, there was nothing we could do to save her. Her heart stopped beating at 1:35 p.m. on Thursday, 09.24.09 and she was born still at 3:04 a.m. on Sunday, 09.27.09. We buried her on Saturday, 10.03.09.

 

We also grieve for our first loss at 7 weeks, 3 days on 11.26.08.
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