Unmarried Partners

Hello everyone! I have been with my fiance for 7yrs,it will be 8 in Feb.. We was talking about wedding vowels tonight and somehow we got on this thing about your wife being your best friend. I was telling him that when you're married you are suppose to see your wife as your best friend. He told me I was living in a fantasy world. He has been married before and this will be my first time. I don't know if his first marriage spoiled him on alot of stuff or if he's just cold hearted. If I'm not seen as his best friend then,what am I? I don't want to be married just to say I have a husband. I want to become as one. If I wasn't living my life to please God I would not even get married until we figure this whole thing out. We have been through alot and he knows that I'm here for him no matter what. I feel like I'm trying so hard and I'm getting nothing in return. He told me onetime that he does not let me know just how much he loves me because I might take advantage of him. What is that to say? Can anyone help me out with a little advice?

Thanks alot!!

Honestly, it sounds as if he is a little insecure AND confused.  Those comments I  myself have heard- both from my current SO and ex husband.  WOmen are awesome in that we take our emotions for granted and welcome the full spectrum- and share our feelings very easily.  Men simply don't.  Perhaps his emotions are overwhelming him- and perhaps his heart must separate friend (As in buddy- man companion) from lover.

Did that help?

I will think some more, but this board is closing and I may not be able to get back with you.

Good luck