Bio Moms

I am a bm and sm. With my SM hat on....

If I have SD and she is ill I have my H make the call if SD should stay home or not--he or I text BM (from my phone).

If SD is ill and my H is at work I text BM and let her know of the situation--she makes the decision. I think this is the best way to handle it. MY H nor I WOULD NEVER keep SD out of something without contacting BM.

It is best not to rock the boat, IMO.

I agree with this post.  The GF is playing a game, making herself look like she is the "responsible" one and mom is "uncaring" because she wants her kid to over exert himself while he's sick.  OP addressed this: she was upset about the fact that GF is obviously trying to assert her authority in her position as BD's new lady friend.

Also, nobody has a problem with a kid informing his mother that GF told them their mother is interfering?  Hello, that's disparaging a mother in front of the children.  If she keeps it up BD could lose custody of his children, if OP wanted to do something about it.

Nasty talk about the other people in the household should never be voiced to the kids.  It's an adult problem, not a kid problem.  I'm not saying I'm perfect.  I've done it and kicked myself for it.  But GF doesn't seem to be thinking about anyone's feelings but her own.

That's my take on the OP's story.