As you all know,we idn't tell our kids we used a surrogate because the agency told us not to. Now they are teens. My biological son has moved out an getting married. I love him the same as my girls who aren't biological, but his fiance has a dd and that makes him the father to be of an adopted dd. We are going to tell that.ids, but we were waiting for their brother's wedding to be over in a few months--let them adjust to that. M husband took a turn for the worst financially and the kids are adjusting big time to a harsch new reality of living in a cramped apt. etc. Now on thanksgiving we are having dinner with my cousin. Her kids are adopted. We never discussed how ours came to be., but she might assume they were. What do we do if they bring it up. We rarely see them. They are flying in from California to visit their sister. I'm sure adoption may come up as they are from another country. My kids will ask about it. But today isn't the day we wanted to tell them. We think one of our dds will be relieved as she doesn't look like us and hates that--also had a happy life, but now adolescent angst has set in and I'm sure she would choose a robot over me--her repressive mom who doesn't let her walk in the darkand parade city streets. I am definitely seen as an albattoss around her neck now. I'm sure she would like the surrogate more--who never wanted a photo or letter or contact over all these sixteen yrs. She had two abortions and didn't want any kids but the one she has. But I suspect she would welcome these kids with open arms especually since their grandfather is leaving them a nice trust fund soon. Plus older women--she would be fifty now always wish they had more children. These two turned out great--the work is done. Phew. should I tell my dd when she is undergoing the adjustment of losing her older brother and should I give my kids a choice to meet, visit and form a relkationship--momlike with the surrogate. One is going to college near her.I know they would love it--or suspect they would.
