Stepmoms / Bio Moms Debate

How do you deal with a BD who constantly tries to paint you in the worst light possible? Who tells reflections of the past that are not 1. Appropriate to tell. 2. Truthful and 3. Upsets the child being told?

ETA to take out specifics for my sons sake.

At this point I'd empower your son. Tell him if Dad's lies (and you DO have the right to tell him Dad is lying in this case) bug him that he is free to tell him to stop or to call you and come home immediately. For the next few visits, arrange to be available to go pick him up at a moment's notice. Perhaps having his child leave will make him reconsider his offensive behavior.

Now, that's a lot to ask of a 14 year old, so if DS cannot manage it and still needs some help, I'd recommend some form of mediation with a third party to discuss unacceptable comments to the children. Even if you are a reformed pill-popping hoochie it still isn't the sort of thing one discusses with the children- double if it isn't even true.