Two- and Three-Year-Olds

As the mother of a 2 yo who throws the most amazing tantrums I can assure you it's normal 2 yo behavior.  They are learning how to balance their desires with the rules we set down for them.  They don't understand dangerous, or later, or any of the other whys we give them.  They understand I was having so much fun and you spoiled it for no reason.  Or I want that really cool thing and I don’t understand why you won’t give it to me.

Add to that the fact that even an advanced 2 yo doesn’t have the words to express all the feelings and emotions that are coursing thru them; and what do you expect them to do. 

With Daniel I try to defuse them by talking to him and holding him firmly so that he can’t injure himself, while he gets his frustration out.  I try to head them off by using some techniques that work for his personality.  For instance he does not transition well, so I give him warnings.  When he’s having fun it’s even more important that I let him know (repeatedly) when it’s going to end.  I try to remember to ask him to give me anything he’s not supposed to have (assuming it’s not dangerous) rather than grabbing it from him.  I also try to give him choices whenever possible.  “Would you like eggs or French toast?”  Do you want to wear the airplane shirt or the Mickey Mouse one?”  Little things that (IMO) show respect for him.  It works often enough that it’s well worth the effort. 

I hope this helps some.

I think Logan got bad like that right before three as well... but it seemed to be a stage. I think many times its a control issue.. they feel like they do not have control over anything - so they start to test boundaries and get a little bossy ;)

Logan is just a few months past three, and its getting better. :)

The biggest thing I do is talk to him when he's mad and help him identify how he's feeling and why. Sometimes helping them find the words helps a lot. I also try to stay as consistent as possible.