Breastmilk vs. Formula Debate

Hi All,

I lurk (and occassionally post).  I have an 8 1/2 month old ds.  He used to be a great sleeper even when he was newborn.  Transitioned well from sleeping in the bassinet part time (and with me part time) to the crib.   He nurses to sleep.  He used to nurse to sleep, and I would put him in his crib.  90% of the time he would sleep through the night, but would occasionally need to eat at night.  About a month and a half ago, we went camping and he slept in my sleeping bag.  He also got into the habit of soothing himself back to sleep by nursing.  Since, then he will not sleep in his crib and is unable to sooth himself without nursing.  Usually, he nurses for just a few seconds and goes back to sleep.  Sometimes he even just "stirs" a little, roots, and nurses to sooth himself in his sleep.  He is usually not even hungry and does this often--like almost every hour.  He has been sleeping with us which is not a problem in theory, but in reality I don't sleep well.  We start him off at night in the crib, but he is awake and crying usually within an hour sometimes two.  I am exhausted.  Any suggestions on how teach him how to sooth himself with out nursing.  He does  not take a pacifier.  I don't want to start a debate, but I won't let him CIO.  But any other suggestions would be appreciated.  

Thanks a million

Belle

I feel your pain. I am the same way about CIO, and about co-sleeping (it just doesn't work for me, physically!). I think at this age, as long as he is getting all the nutrition he needs during the day, at night he just may want reassurance. Can your DH/SO help out? It may be rough for a few nights, but if he can get up with your DS every time for a few nights (or longer), then DS will figure out that he can't nurse. Then once he's used to that, maybe he'll wake less. If not, then you can try getting up with him some of the time but only rocking him, not nursing.

I have no idea if this will work or not. I'd love to say we did it and it worked, but we've never been able to accomplish more than one night of it. DH becomes "night deaf" and doesn't hear DD crying. I wish I could, but even with the monitor off I can hear her!

I hope you get some sleep soon. I know what it's like to be so sleep deprived you're ready to run away from home just to catch a nap. ((HUGS))

 

Thank you for the suggestion. My DH works lots of hours with a 45 minute (each way) commute. He has to get up at 2:00am to leave for work by 3:00am. I am sure he would be willing to try on the next weekend he has off. I am sure that none of us will get much sleep for a few nights, but it would be worth it, if it would work. I'll keep you posted.

Thank you again
Belle

((HUGS)), I know the sleep deprivation routine well!  I partially coslept about 6 hours a night against my will when Galete was 6 to 9 mos.  She was in daycare and they didn't understand the difference between sleepy and hungry (don't ask), so she was up all night because she was overtired, and I was working 45 hours a week and couldn't deal with being up every hour to nurse.  She is a restless sleeper so I didn't do well with her in bed, but at least I wasn't physically getting up all night.  My DH works 70 to 90 hours a week and, YK, doesn't have boobs, so there was only so much he could do to help.

Anyway, when I quit work I used No-Cry Sleep Solution to get her back to her crib and break the all-night nursing.  It was REALLY tough to be getting up every few hours to get her when she woke up, but it only took 2 weeks or so.  I would put her to bed in her crib and force myself to nurse her in her room until she was close to asleep, then unlatch her and just hold her until she was asleep enough to put her down.  Little by little I started to unlatch her sooner, then put her down while she was still awake.  Within those few weeks I was at the point where I didn't nurse at all, just picked her up and rocked her for a minute or two and put her down awake.  The last night, I did let her "CIO" -- because by the time I got myself out of bed and towards her room she had fallen back asleep on her own.  She STTN'd for 3 glorious months.

The best I can say is that I have found through many rounds of sleep training a child who doesn't like to sleep -- the last time I worked very hard to get her from 7 nightwakings to 2, and that's where she stayed until spontaneously nightweaning at 22 1/2 mos -- is that you will be more tired for the few weeks you're dealing with it, but if and when it kicks in, it will have been worth it.