discussion title:
Please help, can't stop crying
message #:
6164.6 in response to 6164.4
You inadvertently answered the question as to why you get in such messes. You said something to the effect, I don't know why I get in such bad relationships. It is all I have every known.
and THAT is the key. I have gone to therapy to find out why I stayed in a terrible marriage for 26 years, and the KEY was, I grew up in a home with similar emotional abuse, and my therapist said, "we are all drawn to what is familiar. It is comfortable for us even if it was HELL". Knowing that, it is important that you extracate yourself from this situation. You are putting yourself subconsciously back in a position that is familiar to you, even though it is miserable.
You should not pursue a relationship till you have been able to sort through this issue, because you will not be attracted to a good man, but will instead seek out another man who will treat you badly, and that is as sure as rain!
