discussion title:
My father passed away last Saturday
Dear friends,
This is a quick note to let you know that my father passed away last Saturday late afternoon, just before dusk. My brother B was at his side when he passed on. My father was still unconscious, but he was at peace and in no pain.
Whilst we are greatly saddened, we had already been prepare - as prepared as can be - for this. His blood pressure was low, and his heart rate was also tended to be on the low side. On Friday early morning they had to intubate him and put his on a respirator. His condition, while critical, was stable throughout Friday and Saturday. Just before he died his condition worsened, and then he was gone a few minutes later. We each had had time to say our good byes, though, and my youngest brother had also time to say his good byes via the telephone.
My father was buried in the town of Solo on Sunday morning. The funeral was simple, attended only by close family members and a few very close friends - just what my mother needed and what my father had wanted. I don't think that any of us could have dealt with a huge or lengthy funeral. Though he was a veteran of the Indonesian Independence, which means that he was allowed to be buried in the Hero's Cemetery in Jakarta, he had chosen to be buried in my mother's family's small cemetery where my maternal grandmother and her family are buried. My mother wishes to be buried there when she dies to be near her mother and her beloved grandfather, and my father wished to be near my mother.
My mother and I are still in Solo, and my youngest brother joined us yesterday. We will be here a few more days.
Thank you all so very much for all the thoughts, prayers and messages of support that you have been sending our way. It's been a difficult 5 years for us, and you cannot imagine how your friendship has helped me throughout this time.
I like to think that my father is free now. At peace, free from illness, free from home dialysis, able to hear clearly again which means able to listen to his beloved music again. I am sure that he is now surrounded by all who love him, from my sister Bintang to his family and all of his friends who had passed on before him.
My mother is doing well, but the return to Jakarta will be difficult as it is at home where our loss will be the most felt.
Much love,
Poppy
