Betrayed Spouses Support

I haven't been able to post much at all.  I was already wading in the new info about DH's first EA last Sunday, I felt so depressed to find he had indeed withheld the worst all these years, and then I found out the bi+ch in Boston DH has portrayed as a saint has spread lies about ME, why we may never know.  (I plan to try to USE that incident as a tool, by the way - I'll see the therapist soon and ask for help to learn how to let go of slights and hurts, I think that one is the ideal example to tell her about, since hanging onto hurts forever has become a disease for me.)  Any of you feel when you get NEW information like this it feels like another D-day?  

 I've mentioned I was trying to heal from back strain from PT for my repaired knee the past couple of months, had recently wrenched the GOOD knee, am still getting over a bad sinus infection, and then this disturbing week with DH came into play.  BUT I don't think I've mentioned I've spent a total of about 11 hours in the ER divided between last Sunday and again on Thursday night because a kidney stone made its presence known and is still there hurting sooooo badly.  It really is true that when it rains it pours. 

At least we're having a 60-degree day here, looks and feels like a typical Indian summer day out there.  DH has once again been taking incredibly good care of me this week, I'm beginning to wonder if this new persona of his might just be here to stay. 

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a tough week, but glad to hear your H is helping you out so much. That's really great!

I've been sick with various cold/flu kind of stuff off and on for a week or two. I find that it doesn't take much added stress to make me feel like I'm out of control. I think that before d-day I was much better at dealing with stress. I knew that things were always at least pretty good at home and felt that nothing could rock the foundation that my H and I had established. Now that that is in question I have a much harder time dealing with added stresses. Of course, I understand that stress often exhibits itself physically, so I am really trying to take care of myself physically and to manage the stress as much as possible.

I hear what you are saying about new information. I wouldn't say it's like a new d-day - mine was traumatic enough that I can't imagine much that would be on that level, but it is always a blow to find out new stuff. A couple of times it has been straight out lies or omissions, but more often it has been things I assumed and then later find out otherwise as we talked through things. (Like I always assumed that he got together with other women impulsively, but later found out that there was usually weeks of flirting leading up to things.) I hate to find out new stuff like that, and it seems to be spread out just enough to keep me off balance, but then again, finding it out all at once may have been too much for me.

Good luck with the therapist appointment, and I hope that you are also feeling physically better soon.