How do I stop worrying?

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ama0118

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Nov-6

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discussion title:

How do I stop worrying?

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1274.1

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ama0118

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Nov-6 10:22 am

My bf and I just moved in together. Before him, I have been in 3 serious relationships (one marriage) and they all cheated on me and lied to me all the time. I am trying very hard to not take those past issues into the present but just can't seem to do it. My bf knows about my past relationships and swears that he will never do those things and is very understanding. He knows that I am insecure and how I feel. Well, about one week after moving in together, I started worrying constantly about him. For instance, he is a big part of the company he works for. He gets calls all day and even at night from work. So, he has to have his phone on him at all times. But recently, he has even been bringing his phone into the bathroom with him and outside when he goes to smoke. That phone is never out of his sight. So I worry why he does that. Is he trying to hide something? When I asked him about it, he said that he doesn't do it to hide anything and even told me that I can go through his phone whenever I want if it makes me feel better.
I also worry about him while he is at work though. His last 2 relationships have been with people he worked with, actually, I used to work there. He works A LOT, so that is how he ends up dating people he works with. Anyway, he does interviews and helps with training. Well, all week he has been interviewing women for an open position. So I have been worrying about that. What if she is pretty? What if he likes her or they go out? I hate this! As far as I know, he hasn't lied to me about anything. How do I stop this consistent worrying and just be happy? If it's not one thing I am worrying about, it's another! HELP me please before I ruin a good thing!

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cl-princessb07

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discussion title:

How do I stop worrying?

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1274.2 in response to 1274.1

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cl-princessb07

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ama0118

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Nov-6 7:20 pm

Nice to have you on the board!!

Worrying and insecurity is never a good combination. I have been on both ends of the spectrum and each have their share of liabilities. I'm sure all of us have been hurt in the past to a degree that it is EXTREMELY hard to fully live in the present. In life, we have to take the good and the bad. It is nothing wrong with been cautious to a certain extent. You have been hurt. Therefore, you know it can happen. I suggest you just don't blow things out of context until you have a reason to, hopefully you won't have to deal with that again.

Have you considered counseling?