Ask the Dating Doyenne

So here's the deal, there is this woman I know and have known for about 4 years now. Over the years we have had the chance to get to know each other much better through a shared job and classes. We have always gotten along and I can tell she thinks highly of me.

Recently she randomly started a conversation with me about a show that I've been watching. she sent me a private message on Facebook about it and how she loves the show too. In the couple of encounters that I've seen her since, we keep talking about how she wants to come over to my place some time and watch some episodes.

She has been throwing signs my way that she is interested in me. She wants to watch this show, but not with my roommate around (she says that he's annoying, but I'm not convinced that's the whole of it), She lights up when she sees me, and when I saw her last, she actually seemed sad I was leaving and wanted me to hang around with her longer.

Here's the problem....she has a boyfriend. okay, so this is a big problem. She has been in a relationship with this guy for several years now. She never talks about him when I'm around, but the point is that she is super spoken for.

I'm crazy for this girl and have been for years. I feel that she has a genuine interest in me and I have a very significant opening to make a move on her as well by inviting her over to my place to watch this show. I don't know what to do...should I have her over and keep it just friends? should I make a move? Should I tell her how I feel so I can hopefully get some feedback from her? Give me some help please!

It is an opening all right. I am not sure what her agenda is.

She has a bf of several years. Ask her straight up about it. You need to know. Until she unentangles herself from him, I would stay away. You will only get hurt-you don't need to be in a triangle.

Based on your feelings for her, cultivating a deeper friendship is probably not in your best interest. You see her at work, you can be pleasant to her. That's it.

Why waste your time and energy on someone who is taken when you could be just a step away from meeting someone who is available.

Good luck, I hope this helps in some way.

Leave her alone, she is in a relationship., you are just asking for trouble.  If she will do something like this with her current bf, what makes you so sure she wouldn't do the same to you?  Why would you want the kind of drama something like this leads to in your life? As long as you have other feelings for her you can't be just "friends"  this sounds like it is turning  into an emotional affair, which is just as damaging as a physical one...and it doesn't say a lot about her moral character.

You are crazy for who you think she is, knowing someone and knowing them by actually being in a romantic relationship with them are two very different things. Believe the phrase...what goes around comes around.

Being in a relationship is an automatic deal breaker. Sorry, I know it sucks, but just think about if you were the poor guy who had to deal with his long-time lady love leaving him for someone else?

I think you should just bring it up to her. Make it clear that all you want is to be friends, at least while she still has a boyfriend. That's the only way to stay on the moral good side of this situation, I think.