Ask the Dating Doyenne

Hello, so I met this girl a few weeks ago and we really hit it off. It was to the point that she made it a point to give me her number when I didn't even ask for it.

After a few days I called her and asked her if she wanted to go to coffee. The conversation was super positive and it went really well...except, she didn't want to set up a time to have coffee. She said she would text me some available times, but she really wanted to go, she was just really busy that week.

5 days pass and I didn't hear from her, or see her, so I called again to catch up and try again to set something up. The conversation was positive on the whole and she said she hadn't forgotten about me, but was still non-committal on setting a firm time for the date.

I essentially decided that I shouldn't push things any further, I don't want to come off as a weirdo. We've had a few more encounters since then, and they've been friendly. While they've been short, in all cases it has been a circumstance where we really couldn't talk long(passing in a hallway, going down an elevator, etc). And everytime she seems genuinely happy to see me. She seems comfortable, lights up a little in the eyes, smiles, and shows positive body language.

I think one issue might be that she is significantly younger than me. She is a freshmen while i'm a 5th year. In retrospect, I think I probably should have taken the bull by the horns a little and sought her a little more strongly (like saying "why don't we schedule a time and if it doesn't work we can reschedule" and things like that)

The big development lately however is that she has recently been listed as "in a relationship" with someone else on a certain social networking site.

What should I do here? I saw her today and I can't believe how much I wanted to be with her and pursue a relationship with her. In our conversation today, she looked nervous as she was getting ready to go to a meeting with a professor. I thought this might be a chance to contact her seeing if she would like to talk about things over coffee because she seemed stressed. Would this be weird? Should I try to make a move again with her, acting like I don't know she's in a relationship? Should I try to get in her life a little more so she can get to know me better? Should I drop it like it's a bad habit? What should I do?

Thanks for any help!

Drop it, she isn't interested in you and it seriously looks like she considers herself in a relationship with someone else.

One of the things that girls hate most is a guy who can't take a hint, or thinks that if he wants her badly enough he is entitled to date her. I really really think you should back off. She hasn't given you any reason to continue pursuing. There are other women out there! You will find one.

This actually brings up an interesting point that is part of my confusion with this situation. For every signal that says she might not be interested, she gives me another 4 or 5 positive signals.

Yeah not calling me back is a bad sign...but what if she's just been absent minded about the situation? What if she doesn't think she would have a chance starting a relationship with someone 5 years older, so instead she agreed to a relationship with someone her age who has been around her more pushing things more often than I have?

Why did she go out of her way to give me her number? Why does she light up when she sees me? Why has she told me multiple times that I've made her day? Why is she still so friendly around me if she thinks I'm pushing things too much? Why did she without hesitation agree to coffee?

I'm not trying to get the girl because I "like her so much, that I feel I deserve her." I'm just simply trying to add everything up.

If I should drop it, I'll drop it. I'm still confused though and therefore I'm not convinced.

IMO, I think most girls are more considerate of other ppl's feelings and tend to be "nicer" (not saying all but most), just because she remains positive and friendly when she sees you does not mean she is interested. 

To be brutelly honest, the fact that she has not mentioned anything about meeting up with you and with the "in a relationship" as her social status, to me that is obvious enough that she is not interested.

I understand that by her giving out her number might've caused some confusion.  Who knows why she did it? Maybe she thinks you're a nice person and wouldnt mind being your friend?  OR maybe at the time of giving you her number, her current "relationship" wasnt exactly official yet?  There could be many reasons but it is safe to say at this point, you should stop chasing because you dont want to turn her off.  Who knows, maybe there's still a chance with her in the future just not now.