Dealing with In-Laws

So heres the deal, my husband and I are living back with our parents because i lost my job, and subsequently our beautiful apartment. now we are living with our parents until i can find a job and we can get our debt under control (all medical ugh).  this situation would not be so bad if we did not have to live separately with our own parents.

all because my FIL doesn't want me living with him, and to make things worse i only get to stay over once a week, scratch that, he's cutting it to twice a month!

i don't get it, his Parents let he and his first wife live together when they were having trouble. so i know it's not a religious thing and even if it was, we're married now. i don't get why I'm being pushed out of my husbands life.

and no my husband cant live with me because he cant afford the gas to get to and from work every day (120 miles round trip), plus our bed does not fit in my bedroom so he would either be crammed into a single with me or sleeping on the couch.

i really don't get where he's coming from, it seems like he's trying to put a wedge between us and i don't understand why. i thought he liked me. i already have the MIL from hell to deal with, i thought at least had a good FIL.

Oh, dear. I don't know how to say this other than your problem isn't your FIL. I have two son's. If I ever told them that their wife couldn't come here to live, I'm very confident that they would tell me where to go, how to get there and how long to stay.

I think I'd confront DH! If you guys really want to be together, you'll find a way.

Once again, I'm with ohearto on this one... What in the hell-o is wrong with the fil why you and your husband can't cohabit together?

Sounds like a control issue here. I, like ohearto, would have been told off big time by my sons but then again, I'd never make such stupid demands. You're married for crying out loud.

What does your dh say about this to his father?

When you finally do get your own place, I think a little pay back is in order and I wouldn't let him step foot in my house. The nerve of your fil makes me want to put itching powder in his jock shorts! Hugs, Lu

he's just trying to keep peace, because we don't have any other option. if his dad throws him out he's got nowhere to live, because he and my step father would probably get into it in a very dangerous way the first time he said something to me (he's a grade A "insert profane descriptor here", to put it lightly).

and if he's got nowhere to live, he cant work, and if he cant work we don't have insurance (i am a medical nightmare), and our debt is just going to get out of control.

i feel one reason I'm not particularly welcome is because i keep reptiles, snakes to be exact. and I've been getting allot of grief from everyone but my mother and husband about them. i guess it makes me an awful woman to collect something other then shoes and purses. FIL is not however even remotely afraid of them so i fail to see a problem.

i don't have the slightest clue what the other issues might be though. maybe nether one of his parents liked me in the first place and his dad was just better at hiding it. 

I have to be very honest with you. My kids (adults now) would not even be allowed near my home if they even thought about bringing a snake in here. Thank heavens that isn't an issue.

When you want to or have to live with someone else, you have to accept that they may not want your pet's. Whether it's a dog, cat, or snake. My son, his now ex and baby had to move in with me. They had a cat. They had to leave the cat with friends cause I'm not allowed to have them here. I love cats. But I have rules I must follow.

If you DH is working, could he find a rooming house? Or a cheap place to live? Even if it's a very small place, it would be better than things are now.