discussion title:
Am I being overly controlling
Ok to make a long story short, this is what happened....
My husband and I got married in 2001. We continuously squabble for weeks at a time and then get along for weeks at a time then....we had a huge fight one day in 2003 and he moved out into the apartment with an ex girlfriend (the I am just friends with her one). I cried my eyes out and sat for days with a broken heart. I asked him to come home and he said no. I confronted him about an affair with this woman and he said they were just friends and he moved in with her because he had no where else to go. He stayed there for a week before the police come to that apartment and take everyone there to jail for manufacturing meth. Now he comes back to me....when I bond him out of jail. I am still heartbroken. I feel betrayed and am unable to get over it at this point. We know he is going to prison for this charge so we run to another state. After being in the other state for 2 months it is a constant argument. He gets tired of my insecurities and arguing all of the time and he turns himself in and does 3 years in prison. I move on with my life and found someone else after being alone for 2 of the 3 years. Ok now....he gets out of prison in 2007. We decide to work things out and get back together. We have been doing ok since we got back together until lately. I got laid off of work and he pays 700.00 a month in child support. Needless to say we mostly argue because I am so stressed over money. I try to talk to him about what is bothering me but his answer is "you need to see a doctor and get on medicine". Ok so I go and see a doctor and go to counseling. Now his answer is "the medicine is making you crazy!" So now I get off of it. Two weeks ago we split up for 3 days. I am upset and hurt but moving on. We are now back together and doing fine. BAM! I hear from him today that is EX WIFE (one that he had no idea where she even lived for the last 12 years until she called him at work one day about a month ago) is sending him pictures of his kids and his mom and HER to his work in the mail! I asked him about this and he said he talked to her while we were broke up and gave her the address to his work to send the stuff to. He did not bother to mention all of this overwhelming information to me until today when he slips and tells me he got some pictures at work. I asked him why he got pictures at work in the mail and not at home in the mail. I am feeling absolutely heart broken all over again. He feels like he did nothing wrong. I feel betrayed that he is getting pictures from an ex. I feel like he was trying to hide this from me by getting the pictures at work. I also feel he is trying to hide something from me by not telling me outright. What am I supposed to do? Am I wrong for feeling the way I am. I just feel that I am having to compete with yet another ex! I think I would be ok but we have no sexual relationship hardly and have not had one in quite some time. We have "alone time" about once every 2 weeks and other than that it seems that there is no intimacy at all. Someone please tell me an honest opinion. I feel like I am in a relationship that I can't become comfortable in (and I know this is what affects my love life) because every time I get the least bit of relief in this relationship something else seems to slap me in the face. I love this man but I love me too! I feel like I am choosing him over myself. What should I do?
Love 
