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Relationships in Our 20s

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rekindle old flame??

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  12038.1
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  Oct-30 2:20 pm

I've reconnected with my ex recently, and I think we both still have feelings for each other... LONG DISTANCE?

I dated this guy back in 2002. We recently reconnected when he invited me out to visit him for a weekend. A few months ago I ended a five year relationship, and the trip was a nice get away from all of the drama with my breakup.

We had a great time just hanging out, we didn't plan a whole lot of activities. It did take a little bit to warm up to each other again, because it had been three years since we had seen each other. He lives by himself and works full time, and I will graduate in May. He kept hinting that I should move to where he lives when I'm done with school, but I don't know if it was a joke or something real. We didn't kiss, didn't fool around or anything, we just fell asleep "spooning" on the couch and took a nap. That was it- nothing more.

Ever since I've gotten back home, he's been randomly texting me and I cannot stop thinking about him. We have such a fun and relaxing relationship with each other and I am starting to have feelings for him again... however I don't know how it could work long distance... He lives five states away!

He keeps texting me things that make me feel like he has the same feelings for me again... am I nuts? He travels alot for work and is always keeping me updated on where he is (which I find kind of wierd) but then he always says something like "Just telling you where I am in case you want to come visit".
I'm so confused. I just don't know how it would work and I'm too afraid to bring it up without looking like a freak.
 
We were both young before (18) and he was looking to transfer to another school. Neither of us were mature enough to be in a serious relationship, let alone one that was across state lines . His hometown in IL is an hour away from mine, and I told him that he better look me up when he comes home for Christmas... his reponse was "Trust me, you'll be the first one to know".
 
Do I wait it out, see him over Christmas and then go from there? After graduation, I have nothing tying me down, however I also am not going to move half way across the country on a whim or "possible" relationship.
 
Any advice? Do I talk to him about it?
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rekindle old flame??

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  12038.2 in response to 12038.1
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  Nov-2 10:37 am

Yes, you talk to him about it. You are only guessing about how he feels at this point. It would be much easier to make an informed decision if you had more information, and knowing how he feels is an important piece of information.

Moving across the country for a possible relationship is pretty crazy. But, doing it for a good relationship that both partners are vested in definitely isn't the craziest thing a person could do. Just make sure you are able to support yourself financially, have a good job, etc. if you make the move. You need to provide for yourself, of course, but moving to explore love doesn't seem any crazier to me than moving across the country for a job, which is something people do everyday.

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rekindle old flame??

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  12038.3 in response to 12038.1
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  Nov-5 11:26 am

I agree with Nikki that talking to him is the best way to know for sure.

Here's a link you may find interesting: The Rekindled Flame Phenomenon

 
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rekindle old flame??

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  12038.4 in response to 12038.1
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  Nov-10 5:05 pm

I found this video on the subject of rekindling an old love inspiring!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5RbSXxwiYMY

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rekindle old flame??

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  12038.5 in response to 12038.4
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  Nov-12 10:12 am

I agree, a lot of people move across the country for a job without knowing really what will be the outcome, just don't throw all caution to the wind and make sure you have a job, money and something to fall back on just incase. I really don't feel it's negative thinking to make sure you have your back covered just incase things don't work out because that would just be looking out for your best interest in any situation whether it works or not. Give it a chance, keep talking to him, see where things go. ;]

~*The One and Only *Kiya*~

 

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