Guy Talk

You want a man's perspective, because you went to a women's board, and they all told you to leave him?  Well........yeah!  You're married to a creep.......you should never have married him, you should never have taken him back from the first time he broke up with you!

What do you expect to hear from a man?  That he's wonderful, and you're a miserable woman who doesn't deserve him.....and you should do everything in your power to hold on to him?

Honey, you are a TYPICAL example of a woman who's been brainwashed, controlled, physically, verbally and mentally abused and had every bit of self respect taken away from her.  Starting with your sexual abuse......and then finding a scumbag of a man because you're still in victim mode, and you think that's what you deserve.

You need to get out of this marriage before God Forbid you get pregnant again.  You cannot bring an innocent child into this household with a weak mother and an abusive father.  Also, you state that he would never hurt you?  A man that would urinate on his wife is SICK SICK SICK!  And then pour gasoline on you?  At that point you SHOULD have called the police and had his ass put in  JAIL!!!!!!  That is PHYSICAL ABUSE, and you are VERY lucky that gasoline didn't accidently catch fire.

You need to get yourself some professional help........because you're still suffering from the teen age abuse.......and this creep has added to the abuse.......and only some professional therapy will help you STOP being a victim and start having some backbone.  You need to learn to love yourself, and to stand up for yourself.

This is another woman's opinion.......I was in an abusive marriage, but I got out before I was completely destroyed.  You will find that there are more women here than men, but believe me........the men that are here will agree with me and any other women that reply to you.  Good Luck.......get some help and get out of that mess you're in.

PS:  If he was a "normal decent" man......he would have probably ended your relationship for good when you cheated on him....and by the way, he does NOT need to know any details about it.  But he's not a normal decent man, and he loves that he has that dirt to rub your nose in. 

Do you really need someone to tell you to get out?  You're in an abusive relationship, you're being emotionally, verbally and physically abused.  GET OUT!

Don't say he never would hurt you, he certainly can, he already did and chances are if you stick around long enough he will end up killing you.   How much more abuse are you willing to take before you stand up for yourself and get far away from him? 

I don't know any man that would tell you anything different than what women have told you.  No decent man would do any of the things this guy has done.  Leave now before it's too late.

I have to agree with the others. You really need to get away and fast. He's already hurt you, and you stay. Why? No "man" in their right mind would ever do anything like he's done to you (peeing, pouring gasoline and threatenting to light it). He's a controlling idiot. He convinced you to have an abortion. If he didn't want a child, did he do anything to prevent it from happening? Are the two of you doing anything to prevent another pregnancy?

You are not a slut/whore. You made a mistake, hell we all do. We're only human.