Life After Betrayal

what kind of man does this? a man who is only concerned with his wants and needs.

was he thinking about you and how you would feel when you finally found out? was he thinking about you and the potential for pregnancy when he began having sex with you? what he thinking about you and hurt you would be?

was he thinking about his wife? was he thinking about their child together? was he thinking about how hurt she would feel when she found out?

the answer to all of these questions is NO. he was too self absorbed with his own selfish needs and wants.

i would caution you to think seriously about even thinking about a future with him, can you ever trust him after what he has done. men like him will use every trick in the book, lie, lie, lie, and then lie some more.

i would recommend finding a good personal therapist, as you are going to need some one to speak to, a shoulder so to speak.

i would caution you to see him for the man he really is and NOT the man you want him to be. you can not change who he is - and neither will your child. only he can change who and what he is.

please take care of yourself, i am so sorry that you have found yourself here.

I would seek out some counseling.  This is a very tough spot to be in. 

If he was living with you obviously his M is not healthy and I am glad he did come clean. 

Also, now not saying this right, but there are some who if they feel like D inevidiable, they will talk as if they are divorced.  Heck, some people move forward with their lives separately and because of health insurance will stay married for years. 

Anyways, probably getting off topic for this board, so definately find an impartial person who can not only help you, but if he does participate in the childs life can help the two of you navigate that regardless of whether he stays married or gets divorced.

You may also want to lurk on some of the Affair boards.   LAB is primarily the BS (betrayed spouse) who has learned their spouse cheated and is looking for support whether it is to rebuild their marriage, or not.   However, the sub board below Both Sides is for everyone to constructively discuss betrayal and affair subject matter.

I wish you well. 

HELP? REALLY??? What help do you need???????????????? If you stay with him your are teaching your kid to be like him or to date guys like him....sue him for child support and move on ...the guy  is a PLAYER and a douche! You will NEVER change him. Get some dignity and drop him