discussion title:
Is he playing me? need man's opinion plz
I would really appreciate your opinion on this situtation I had. I went on a blind date set by a friend's friend couple months ago. We met for a coffee. I like to mention briefly of what we conversed about. It came very easy to him to ask personal questions too quickly; such as when was my last relationship and how long did it last, and what happened, and he specifically asked what happened twice. It made me uncomfortable, b/c I have always thought first dates are mainly about sharing/learning basic info. I tried to stay cool, and I told him that our personalities didn't match without specific details. He also wanted to know how come my relationships does not last more than 2 -3 months. Are these normal questions?? Also, to me he seemed too negative, discussing his personal issues with his dad, how some of his married friends are not happy,.....I think you get the picture.
Anyways, after the date obviously i was not interested in him eventhough i found him attractive. I was hoping he wouldn't call. But he did call 3 days later and we talked for a while, and then called few days later & left a message if I wanted to hang out. I was so confused about him, so i didn't call him back, then he called back 4 days later, unfortunately i was busy so I told him I'll call back in 10 minutes. I called back 10 minutes later, rang several times, got his voicmail and i hang up w/o leaving a message. Three weeks passes, I get a call from friend's friend asking on whether i was interested & why i didn't return his call. Apparently, he did not get my call. He told the friend how much he liked me. A couple days later he sends me a text message, and I give a him call. We chat very briefly, he says 'we'll hang out' and I said sure. I do not hear from him until 2 wks later- he left a message asking how I was and that he'll talk to me some other time. Eventough he didn't ask me to call him back, i give him a call the next day, phone rings 4-5 times and no answer and I hang up. And again haven't heard from him and it has been 2 weeks. I need your help on reading this guy; is he interested or not?? If he's not, why did he bother calling me in the first place? IF he is interested what is this mean?. What should I do if he calls again?
discussion title:
Is he playing me? need man's opinion plz
message #:
829.2 in response to 829.1
I need help reading you, Vicky. Here's what I've learned about you from your post: you meet a guy, hang out, you have all these thoughts about whether it's "normal" for him to be how he is, you don't really like him, BUT you're attracted to him.
To me, it's no wonder nothing is getting done. You're not even sure what the heck YOU want, let alone what he wants. He's not playing you, YOU are playing yourself. I'm not trying to pick on you, Vicky, it just seems to me like you don't have your priorities in tact. I know as a self-respecting man, once I had the feelings you had on that first date, that would have been the end of it. But for some reason your clinging on with the hope that something will change.
Everything he did in your first date, by HIS standards, IS normal. That's how he is. And since you didn't really like his way of being, TO ME, it's clear he's not the one for you. So that's why I'm having a hard time understanding why you're wondering what to do. IMO, the only thing left to do is to MOVE ON. I'm not sure if you're willing to accept that reality, so... I wish you well with whatever decision you make.
discussion title:
Is he playing me? need man's opinion plz
message #:
829.3 in response to 829.1
first of all how old is this guy? and how do you really feel after all this you said he was attractive, but he seemed all negitive and all. Is that worth it the confussion he makes you feel? I am the last person to give advice on matters of the heart but honestly think about it like this can you endure that everyday...can you overlook it? everyone deserves a chance but are you up for it?
discussion title:
Is he playing me? need man's opinion plz
message #:
829.4 in response to 829.3
Hi,
Thanks for your response.
He's 38, and I'm 33. I am attracted to him, but his negativeness did bother me. Could it be he was just being too open and too comfortable about whatever situations he had? I'll give some background about him- he works in real estate, maybe he's having difficult time/issues at work,.....I don't know. His last serious relationship ended (6yrs long) 3 yrs ago; he was living w/ his ex then. Recently he moved back to his parents house (he said to help out his dad).
Maybe his timing is off, and wants to keep in touch with me when he's ready..... I don't know. But after our first meeting, he did call me and asked if I wanted to hang out, and I didn't return his call ( My intention was not playing games, I was just confused) Ever since then he has been acting weird. I am not sure if he has chickened out or just playing me. If he's not interested why would he bother contacting me in the first place??
On christmas day, he sent me a text message "MERRY CHRISTMAS", and I didn't respond. What if he sends me a text message on new years day? should I respond? I cannot stand these text messages, I personally prefer calls.
I don't know if it's wise to make my decision based on one date and forget him or give him another chance??
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