How can I compete with the X-box? The x-box is in my son's house (next door). I go to school 3 nights a week on line, instead of staying in the same house with me, making sure that my dogs don't bother me while in class, he closes my office door to make me think he is taking care of the dogs, but in fact he is next door playing the x-box. Yesterday he spent 5 hours (during the day) next door, came home for dinner, when I went into classat 630, he again closed my computer room door, and LEFT! I had to let the dogs into the room with me, so they would stop barking, I got done with class, and did some homework for an hour, 8pm, he was still next door. I called him up, he said "you usually do school work after class", which is total b.s.! I did not say anything, he said he would be over for the 10pm news, well the news came on, no husband. He finally came to bed at 330am..
We have not had sex since March, he got assaulted in July is fine from that ordeal, but still no sex. I am tired of fighting with him about it, he is supposed to get a testrone shot every two weeks, I was so mad I told him to throw away the shot last month, and he has not even drawn up another one. He has no reason why he has not tried to make love, except to say "I can't". I tried to tell him to have a positive attitude, but he refuses to. I told him 2 weeks ago, that I was tired of competing with the x-box and tired of the lack of sex that I was going to go else where ( I know that was wrong to say). It used to be that whether he could do the acutal deed, he would make sure that I was taken care.. that has been 2 years. Our 4 year anniversary is coming up, he wants to go away and I told him to make the plans (which I know he has NOT done) he is too busy playing his stupid x-box. I refuse to make the plans (I always make the plans) and I won't mention it again.
I am tired of going to bed alone and being ignored and told him that I was considering moving back to Fla when I finished school, he said "do what you feel is best". Nice comment huh? I am not sure that I love him anymore, right now I feel contempt. It is like we are roomates, he comes to bed whenever, spends as little time with me and no time with our dogs (he wonders why they don't listen to him). I can't financially afford to leave him, heaven forbid I touch his x-box (I want to go break it), I don't remember the last time I smile and laughed with him, all I do is cry.
Why should you HAVE TO compete against a machine for his affection and attention? If you win against the X-Box you will lose against some other diversion. Trust me, I know this from experience. Both his verbal and non-verbal signals are screaming "leave me alone." For whatever reason, he is unable/unwilling to participate in the relationship right now, and one person alone (you) cannot sustain a relationship.
Hi, thanks for the reply. I told him tonight that I won't compete with that x-box, and that I should break the darn thing. He brought up that he is only over there when I am in school. I mentioned that maybe I should just drop out (I graduate in June 2010), his response was "if that is what you want to do". That pissed me off. He asked me when my last day of school was, and I asked him why, nothing would change he would still be over there playing his game, he said we'll see (what does that mean?) I also let him know that I made a vet appointment for our dogs on our anniversary he asked me why I did that, I explained that it was just another day, and he has not made any reservations. He went to bed early and I mentioned to him that I was tired of being unhappy, not smiling and laughing like I used to, and I deserve to be happy and left it at that. I also mentioned that since he comes to bed at all hours of the night, that if it gets to be 230am he might as well just sleep there, so he does not wake me up, he said "ok". As he was getting ready to go to sleep, I mentioned that maybe I would go sleep next door, he said thats great, I come to bed early and you go sleep next door. I asked him what difference it made, his remark was "you belong here". I don't feel like I do. I am tired of not being happy and I know it is up to me to make myself happy, but I honestly don't know how to do that anymore:(.
Love 
