Hi All, I'm new to this board, and not even sure this is where to post this. I think I have one of the most confusing relationships I have ever heard of and really need some advice on what to do.
Ok, here goes. I met a man (who is 8 years my junior) by accidental text message about 2 weeks ago. He had dialed the wrong number and for some reason, ended up cracking me up and completely intriguing me. We began talking via text and phone daily. Problem is...he's in PA, I'm in TN...he wants to meet, but I'm extremely scared not only because I don't really "know" this man, but because I'm so afraid if things continue like they are going, one of us is going to have to leave our home to be together. Now, I know I shouldn't worry about the future, because it will take care of itself and because things are still very new. But, I cannot leave my home, my family and friends. I really do like this guy and want so badly to get to know him better and meet him. But I'm scared that he could be a murderer, rapist, etc. He's not given me any reason to think that, it's just my over active mind going crazy. Matter of fact he wouldn't even call me until I gave him the ok, even though he already had my number due to the texts. He wants me to visit PA, but I truly don't think that's a good idea. I have never been pulled into a situation where I feel completely drawn to a man that I have only seen a couple of pictures of. But, maybe falling for a voice and a demeanor is better than falling for a "hottie"?? LOL
You could go and meet him, just make it in a public place with back ups (so to speak). I met my guy online and it started off as a joke, 4 years later I went to a different country to meet him. I had him email a copy of his drivers lic., passport, his company information (even though I had it because of the website), and all his phone numbers (home, office and cell, even though I had those too). I then left all the information with a friend of mine and I checked in with them while I was gone.
It can be scary but oh so worth it. You never know he might want to move where you are at. You also never know what the future holds, and you may want to move where he is at.
May I ask what part of PA? I have family in Erie and Titusville. Not sure about where any one else lives there. LOL It would be funny if it was a memeber of my family. LOL
Welcome to the boards. If you don't want to go there, have him come to you. Airplanes and cars can travel in both directions.
I know you don't want to think to far about the future, but the fact that you don't feel you could ever move could be a major issue if things do progress. If he feels the same way, then you both will wind up hurt when you realize that neither of you wants to move away from where you are. (Just something to think about).
My husband is from PA (grew up near Erie then moved near Harrisburg). :) I'm from Delaware.
Anyway, if you decide that the two of you really do want to meet, definitely make sure it's a public place and someone knows where you are going and when you should be home (just to be safe). If he comes to you, you could always take a friend with you for the initial meeting.
Follow your heart, but listen to your gut. If something about this is screaming out to you that it's a bad idea, then don't do it.
Let us know how things go and if we can help you with anything else.
Thanks so much for your advice...I'm even more confused tonight than I was this morning...I haven't heard from him at all today since this morning. Scares me a little. I mean, last night got a little intense with the "meeting" talk. I'm not sure what to think at this point. I was really starting to think there was some potential to this, but after today, I'm not so sure. I feel a little let down and exasperated. I've had such a hard time with love in my life. This just seemed to be all going right.
Actually, he's in Philadelphia. If it wasn't for my job, I might be willing to move, but at this point, there may not be any point to any of this.
So, I get a text from him this morning...said he "broke his phone" last night??? What is that? Not that it couldn't happen...but it sounds like such an excuse to me. I don't know whether to believe him or not. I know I have major trust issues with men in particular because of my experiences with a cheating husband and boyfriend in the past. He swears he dropped his phone and it broke, I want to believe him, but it just sounds like an excuse. Am I being overly sensitive? If I could look into his eyes, I could tell if he's lying, but being so far apart, I can't do that. I hate this! I just don't know what to think!
Wow guys, looks like you're going to go for a roller coaster ride with this relationship. I'll drive you all nuts posting about this!
Thanks for your support and for this board where I can vent!
Love 
