May-December Relationships

I had a man ask once

He & BF were talking & BF left to go get something, & hadn't introduced me. So the guy asked, so are you his daughter. I just said no I'm 32 & girlfriend. He said, oh you look young, I said Thanks!!

LOL!  Don't worry about it!

Early on when I first started dating my SO, I dealt with the same kind of riff-raff.  The comments always come from one of two sources:  single men my age or his age, and women his age.  Why? BECAUSE THEY ARE JEALOUS.

At first, it really bothered me.  A LOT.  I still remember the first time we went out, a person I would consider a friend came up to me in the ladies bathroom and said, "he's a cutie but too old for you, so I'm going out there and I'm going to take him off your hands."  Another friend asked me if I'd always wanted to be a "trophy wife."  Another guy I knew called him "an old man." 

Eventually though, I realized all the things those people had in common:  they were generally miserable.  One was going through a divorce, the other thinks everyone has it better than her, and the last had a psycho-wife and was desperate for attention from ANYONE.  And the more I thought about it, the more I realized that they were testing our response to see if we were willing to sink to their level of misery.

So I would simply ignore these "ladies" and keep up your chin up, because 10 years isn't really even that crazy a difference!

(P.S.  An example of how perception is everything:  I was once venting about this to one of the most stable wives I know; she's been married for years, and in her late 60's.  I said, "well, some people don't approve of the age difference between us.  And she looked at me and said, "what age difference?  Aren't you in your late 30's?  He's in his late 30's, right?"  I was like, "no, I'm 29 and he's 45!"  She says, "oh.  Could of fooled me."  LOL!  But because she wasn't LOOKING for something to criticize, she didn't find anything to critisize.

Some folks are just negative! 

I am new to this board, and so excited to have found it and have others to share with who are in the same boat!

I too, am in a May-December relationship - I am 32 and my BF is 52.  We have been dating only about 3 months but have a great relationship so far.  Within the last 2 weeks we have had 3 people mistake us for father & daughter...it was definitely awkward!  Honestly, the first person who asked me if he was my father really took me by surprise; I knew I would probably get that question eventually but you still don't really expect it.  I didn't know what to say so just told her no.  A few days later, I got the same question from another woman I know and I told her no we are dating - she just said "Oh he's your boyfriend" not in a judgemental way, and we moved on with our conversation.  My BF got the question from an acquaintance of his and said it was a bit awkward, too...I guess it's just one of those things we will have to deal with.  We can laugh about it, that's all that matters to me.

What's weirder for me is my family - I think in their minds they believe that this is probably just a fling or something that I will grow out of quickly.  However, I can say that after just 3 months I have strong feelings and I don't see us ending the relationship any time soon.  I wonder about how they will deal with this down the road.

I must say though...it is kind of exciting to me to be one to raise eyebrows.  I'm not a trouble-maker or one to really rock the boat, but it sure makes life interesting when you do something that's against the "norm" - especially when it's something that makes you incredibly happy anyway.  It makes me giggle to myself when we are out in public and we get stares.  Maybe I'm just weird that way... ;-)