May-December Relationships

He is 74. She's 30.

First of all, let's say he is a thin, very attractive, elderly man. It may seem gross to some people, but she says she is actually attracted to him. It may be weird to some, but she said something about him is fascinating to her.

Do you think the female would be arm candy or do you think he'd actually want to get to know her? My friend is very attractive, intelligent, has a career, and owns her own home. I do know she generally dates her age or a little younger, and it's rare that she'd even be interested in a 40 year old man, so this is odd to me.

She has been having dinners with this 74 year old married man. (He hasn't had a sexual relationship with his wife in years, and he has claimed that his wife would be ok with the situation as long as it wasn't flaunted around her. His wife lives in England and he lives in the states, so does my friend.)

Anyway, he doesn't call my friend everyday due a hectic work schedule. He runs some sort of international business. At times he does call to chat, but not on a daily basis. She sometimes feels neglected and wonders if he is honestly interested in getting to know her mind.

He has only been calling to schedule these dinners with her, and to check in from time to time. He has expressed interest in taking her on trips to Spain and whatnot. He told her he's looking for someone to share the beauty in life with. He'd like it include sex sometimes, and said it could also lead to love. He told her that he is not in love with his wife and would like to fall in love with someone. He has left the nature of their relationship in her hands. She was kind of pushing the friend thing, but he said he can only do that for so long before feelings develop on his side. She hasn't had sex with him, but he has asked her if she'd be interested in that at some point. He recently went out of town and she had not heard from him for about a week, so she basically sent him an email agreeing to do whatever it is he wants. He responded within 3 minutes.

Now she is nervous. Do you think he will actively pursue to sexual side of the relationship? Do you think he has any interest in her as a person? She is attracted to him, but she is so unsure of the situation.

I hope she doesn't wind up pregnant.-although, I have heard men can become sterile as they age?

It's scary. . . . .I'm invovled in a similar relationship - and I'm the old guy.

If the girl wants to do it she wants to do it. It's up to her. She can make an old guy very happy, whether the reverse is true is another issue.