MAS

So this is my weekend alone (my son is with his dad) and all I am doing is moping around wishing I could be with AP.  (never mind that he was already here for 4 hours this morning and will be back again tomorrow).  You would think that would be enough for me to snap out of it and enjoy my alone time (that I so DESPERATELY wanted before my H and I separated).  But nooooo, here I sit, daydreaming about AP and how much I miss him right now, how much I want to feel his arms around me again and wondering when all this craziness is going to end and we are going to be together "for real".  (and we dont need to go there! - i posted last week about the reality of that issue! LOL) 

Why cant I snap out of it when we are not together?  This is pathetic! 

Hi alive,

I feel the same way. I definitely need to get a life. My and H and I are seperated too but AP is still with his W. ugh! I miss him alot even when I've just seen him. I'm actually frustrated right now. He just called and wanted to vent about something that has to do with his son. This is a child from another R not by his W. I was all ears and being understanding, trying to comfort. Then he had to mention his W's name. I guess he had discussed it with her too. After he said that, I didnt even hear him anymore. Once we got off the phone I just started crying. Anytime he says her name I feel like I'm ready to dump him. It just throws the whole situation in my face and reminds me that yes, he is married and he and W do communicate. He might not ever leave her.

I know that is a possibility anyway but still, I dont want to hear anything about her. Especially when you stated how much you love me and can see being with me forever. I sit here and wonder also when this craziness will end. I simply cant take this much longer. Well, I didnt mean to go all into that, I just needed to vent.

Hi Caribu,

Don't worry about the vent!  That's what we are here for each other for. =)  In my situation I know that AP and his W do not communicate at all but I still hate just sitting here knowing that he is at home with his family, doing family stuff, waiting to find a chance to text or call me whenever he can.  I know he is working thru all of this in his head and I still think he is due some more time to figure it all out but it doesnt make the lonely nights any better.  Like your AP, mine has told me that "he could spend the rest of his life with me" (he just doesnt quite know yet how to make that happen).  And here is where my sarcastic side comes in.... Easy:  Tell the controlling you know what that the marriage is over and you are sick of her crap!!  LOL  Yeah, I know.... it doesnt work that way!  But I can fantasize, cant I? 

Honestly, I am just getting really concerned that she is going to figure out he is having an affair before he makes his move.  He spends so much time with me... I would be really suspicious by now if I were her. 

Oh well, I am going to force myself to do something more productive right now than stalking my cell phone for a text or call.... LOL

Thanks for responding to my post... it does at least help a little to know I am not the only one out there doing this!!  One day at a time is what I keep telling myself.  And right now we are really looking forward to next weekend because the W is going out of town for a week so we will get to have at least 4 sleep-overs on the nights when my son is with his dad and grandparents.  Woo Hoo!! I cant wait!!

Hope you have a good night. =)