Single Mothers & Dating

The conversation ended up being this morning, not last night as was planned.

The ex is in agreement with S that the pictures needed to be gone. He said it is too painful for the kids to look at. .....

I said "have you considered asking the kids what they would like?"

His response, "Ds asked me yesterday where they were, but I told him to forget about the pictures because that is the past".

I said, "Nice way to consider your child's feelings and put him first. I'm sure ds would hate to see those pictures be such a burden on S."

Him: "Now you are going to insult me?"

Me: "No, you just insulted your son and I put into words what he was thinking and couldn't express himself."

*******

So you all know, I did remove all the blankets, blessing gowns, etc., a long time ago when I first realized S was throwing away everything. I thought I was being paranoid about the pictures and (stupidly) thought that the ex would have more sense than to let anything happen to the pictures.

My question is this- the ex asked if I wanted the sheets to an old comforter on his bed since 'I already have the comforter'. I told him I don't have the comforter, it must have been thrown away like the curtains and all the kids' clothes. BUT, I would like to take the afghan that my grandmother made the kids. He said no. !! Ummm, isn't that technically MINE since MY grandmother made it? Should I take it anyway before something that precious gets thrown away too once she finds out it's sentimental to me?

That may be a "duh" question, but the reason I'm asking is that I feel like the ex and I are on the brink of an all out war and I don't want it to erupt. On the nights when he has the kids, I go over there early so he can leave for work and I get the kids ready for school. I love being there for them, and I feel like the next step in ridding me is to have S change her schedule so she can be there to do this for the kids. I don't want that. So, to keep things from escalating, should I just leave it there and risk it being thrown away?

I am a very non-confrontational person. I hate getting into arguments and fights, and I will try to avoid them at all costs. That said - get your ass over there and get your stuff! Don't you dare let that horrible woman lay a finger on anything else that is important to you! If I were you I'd find a way to change the schedule so that S can't do those things for your kids. There's no reason she needs to be doing that stuff anyway. When the kids are at their dad's they are there to see HIM. If he's not there then they don't need to be either.

That's my 2 cents.

 

Busy, this is horrible. I agree that you should get your things before witchypoo can do any further destruction. Yuck. Is this the home you and your xh used to live in? Just wondering - how much of your stuff may actually be there.

And not to digress, but I have to, Tiara... that I seriously died laughing at parts of 40 y/o virgin... i'd have to say my favorite is the poker game convo about women's breasts feeling like giant bags of sand... etc. and how he makes the comment, "you guys are so...out your asses" LOL. Sorry to take away from your post, though, busy! I'd be really upset :(

I'm confused as to why your ex has anything that you hold in sentimental value?  Why wouldn't you have it at your place, especially after S threw the first thing out?

Get over there and get your stuff, bring back up and a truck if you need to.