you are here: iVillage Love Love message boards Understanding Men  / Analyze This  / 
advanced search  |  outline view  |  invite a friend  |  folder view  |  about the boards

Understanding Men

83201 messages posted to this board
find messages about   
log in
welcome!
 
next discussion >
last visit to this board
Nov-2


add to friends
ignore posts
discussion title:
 

Am I an emotional cutter?

emoticon:
 emoticon
message #:
  12378.1
replies:
  3
from:
  boots715
date:
  Nov-2 10:44 pm

I've been with my current boyfriend for almost a year. After my last relationship he was like a breath of fresh air. He showed me that I could be treated like a lady and with respect. But lately I've been feeling trapped. I've actually been thinking about my ex. I can't believe it either. He was a complete jerk. After two years of a rocky relationship he stopped seeing me without word and started seeing another woman. I guess the thing I think about most is how my ex excited me during the first six months of our relationship, even when we would makeup. It was like we got to re-live the chase all over again. But I got tired of the rollercoaster. I wanted something stable and that just wasn't my ex. So now I'm with my current guy and he's stable. We spend loads of time together, he's generous but he just doesn't excite me. There's no spark when we kiss. I'm rarely in the mood for sex, because he just doesn't excite me. Part of me feels like I'm only with him because I needed something to help me get over my ex. In past relationships I usually got over the previous ex when I started dating someone else but my ex stays in the back of my mind.  We've had casual conversation by and by, nothing serious but it has stopped over the last month with exception my ex leaving a comment when we were head to head in our fantasy football league. That was the first time we had spoke in a month. It excited me...what's wrong with me?
send to a friend >   print >   bookmark >   report a violation >
last visit to this board
Nov-19


add to friends
ignore posts
discussion title:
 

Am I an emotional cutter?

emoticon:
 emoticon
message #:
  12378.2 in response to 12378.1
replies:
  3
from:
  grlygrl2008
to:
  boots715
date:
  Nov-3 1:00 pm

There is nothing wrong with you....the "bad" boys have always excited me too.  They still do...the nice ones who treat us with respect and are kind are boring to us...the bad boys who don't kiss our butts and are aloof are interesting and exciting therefore the sparks fly.  You need to figure out what it is you want and can't live without...security and respect or the sparks....I hope as we all do to find both but which one is the most important.  Depends where you are in your life I guess.  Good luck!   
send to a friend >   print >   bookmark >   report a violation >
last visit to this board
Nov-20


add to friends
ignore posts
discussion title:
 

Am I an emotional cutter?

emoticon:
 emoticon
message #:
  12378.3 in response to 12378.1
replies:
  3
from:
  mc001
to:
  boots715
date:
  Nov-4 7:43 am

Just my opinion....never digress.  Especially if it was a bad situation.  You'd just be going back to what's easily there for you.  Just find someone that excites you.  That's what dating is all about. 

Take heed from all the broken hearts on this board.  Meet a guy, date for a while, don't rush into sex so quick (almost every thread of that nature ends in heartbreak) and just enjoy men's company until you find the one that floats your boat.  IMO too many people latch onto the first thing they find and try their damndest to make it work.  Why not date for a while, when you see traits you don't like.....break up.  That doesn't' make you shallow, it makes you a smart shopper.
send to a friend >   print >   bookmark >   report a violation >
MESSAGES IN THIS DISCUSSION  
< Jump to Previous Discussion    Jump to Next Discussion >
Change the number of messages
displayed on this page in
Indicate your interest in the discussion
   
Get updates to this discussion
delivered by email