2009 Weddings

If it's that important to you that you absolutely know whether or not they are coming, then yes, you need to contact them and find out. I agree that it is rude, but some people are just that way and there's no sense in getting upset with them because it won't solve any problems.

If you're willing to be a little lenient, maybe you could just make the assumption that half of those 45 people will attend. There will usually be a little extra food if a few more than that do attend, and it might be wise to set up one or two extra tables, also because it may be hard to fit the exact number of people at every table anyways because of family size, etc.

It sounds like you really need to know what is going on with them, if they are coming or not. I'd send them an email, asking them to rsvp through email. Also, since you can't vent on FB because some of them might see ... you might post a reminder that you have til tomorrow to get the RSVPs in. They might get the hint that way too! And if you don't hear back from them, then yeah, maybe call to find out what's going on.

I hope that helps.

I would use FB to your advantage.  Also, keep in mind ppl are super busy these days and may not be intentionally rude in not RSVPing but they are just busy. Since you are the one who needs the info, unfortunately that means you need to follow through.  E-mail, FB, a few phone calls, whatever it takes.  It will be worth the piece of mind you will get once you have a more accurate account of the # of ppl coming. 

p.s.  I knew a bride who vented on FB about ppl not rsvp'ing...i thought it was very rude.